encouragement

Reflection & Action: When I bought myself a bunch of flowers, the florist asked if I wanted a gift card to go with them. I declined, saying they were just for me.

“All the more reason to add a card,” she declared. “I always write myself a card when I buy myself flowers.”

When I asked what she wrote, she replied, “Well, it depends on the day. Sometimes it’s: ‘Thanks for being you.’ Other times it’s: ‘Wow! You’re smart and gorgeous, too!’”

We shared a chuckle. I left with the flowers and a card in hand.

It was a simple reminder of an important lesson. The florist knows how to fill her own wellspring of appreciation. With her own spirits freshly topped up, she’s in a much better position to share her goodwill with others.

Do you take yourself for granted too often? I do. If we don’t show ourselves some positive attention from time to time, who will? Most of us don’t have our loving mothers following us around moment by moment, applauding our courage, cheering our sense of adventure, or delighting in our presence. This is true in our work and personal lives. And if it’s true for us, it’s true for others as well.

What would life be like if you extended a bit more appreciation in your own direction more often? What would it be like if you encouraged others to do the same?

What would you write on your card today?

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Reflection & Action: Rituals are powerful. Hello/goodbye, good morning/good night kisses are an everyday occurrence in my marriage. Leave takings with our daughters—by phone or in person—are punctuated from both sides with the phrase, “Love ya.” Our dinner grace includes a “today I am thankful for …” comment from each person around the table.

As with brushing your teeth in the morning, these actions and phrases have become second nature. That doesn’t make them meaningless. Each exchange expresses deeply held values of love and appreciation.

Rituals bring our values to life. If you value your health, turning a lunchtime walk into an automatic ritual breathes life into that value. If you value family, the ritual of a weekly phone call with a parent or sibling keeps the connection alive. If you value the beauty of nature, the ritual of placing freshly cut flowers on your desk or your table keeps nature in the center of your everyday life. You get the picture.

What kind of rituals are already working for you? What other rituals could you create to shift more of your deeply held values from intention to action?

Tie those practices to a specific time or place. Build them into your daily or weekly routines. Watch the impact!

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Spring On The Trail

Reflection: We’re pretty quick to ask young people about their futures: “What do you want to be when you grow up? What will you do after graduation?”

However, once we step through that portal of adulthood and into a career, a family, and responsibilities of all shapes and sizes, those ‘imagine your future’ questions are often sidelined.

You make a choice. You set out on a path. You’re headed in the right direction. All is well. Or is it?

I recently delivered the closing keynote for a conference of career planners and employment counselors. My message focused on connecting them to the hidden value in what they do and how they are.

The conference planners asked me to also build in a message for those in their mid to late career years who might be faced with: waning interest, lagging energy, or a once raging fire in the belly now faded to glowing embers. And, so I did. Here are a few of the ideas I shared that I thought might also interest you. (more…)

Reflection: While taking my morning walk along the riverbank trail, I came across a couple of staff from the Meewasin Valley Authority. They were working their way along the trail, emptying the garbage cans scattered throughout the park.

It’s a workplace setting that has a lot to offer especially on a warm spring day. You can’t beat the great outdoors with a river view.

Still, emptying trashcans can’t be the most pleasant job in the world. They’re jammed with sticky cans and bottles and the remnants of fast food lunches in the park. To top it off, they’re overflowing with stinky, leaky plastic bags of doggy do.

On my way past, I gave the fellas a wave of my hand. And then I thought, “I could do better than that!”

So I stopped in my tracks, turned around and said, “Hey, guys, thanks for all the work you do cleaning things up out here. It makes a big difference for all of us, and I really appreciate it!”

And they, in turn, stopped what they were doing, looked up, and rewarded me with two of the biggest grins I’ve seen in some time.

I smiled right back and carried on.

Action: And in that small exchange, I was reminded that it doesn’t take much to lift another’s spirits or make someone’s day. (more…)

Looking for a tangible way to encourage and express your appreciation for others in your world?

The Take A Bow booklet (67 Ways To Pause For Applause, Celebrate Your Success, & Keep Your Spirits High) makes a great gift.

It has a much longer shelf life than flowers, and, unlike chocolate, it won’t add unwelcome pounds on the hips!

You’ve always been able to purchase individual copies and bundles of 30 or 100 at reduced prices.

For the month of April, you can take advantage of a Take A Bow Spring Special and pick up  bundles of 10 for 39.50.

Just click here to place your TAB Spring Special order.

PS – They make great gifts for Administrative Professional Day.

Reflection: I so appreciate the fact that spring on the prairies is finally putting in an appearance. It seems that the month of April offers no shortage of opportunities to appreciate a variety of things and people.

This very week in Canada (April 6-12) is National Volunteer Appreciation week. A quick glance at an online calendar of special days reveals that’s not the only special day on this month’s agenda.

April also brings you National Siblings Day (10^th), National Librarian Day (16^th), Volunteer Recognition Day (20th), and Administrative Professional Day (23^rd). You’ll find a host of whacky days on the calendar, too. Feel free to celebrate jelly beans, scrabble, and rubber erasers to name just a few!

In today’s everyday busyness, it’s easy to think that celebration and recognition are not that important – that appreciation is just icing on the cake. However, that’s just not true.

Many employee surveys show that a lack of recognition, appreciation and acknowledgement are a major workplace issue and a significant source of disengagement. It’s such a shame, because it’s such an easy challenge to address.

Action: What to do? Focus on small daily appreciative actions like these. (more…)

Reflection: As I was reviewing the Pause reader suggestions for topics to cover in future editions, this question caught my eye: “How do I find the courage to start a new endeavor? I’m wanting to start my own business. When I see that others are already doing what I want to do, does that mean there’s no room for me?”

Now, I know that not all of you are thinking of starting a new business. However, I have a serious hunch that every single one of you is toying with an idea, a pursuit, or a new endeavor of some kind that is nudging you to bring it to life. It’s a similar conundrum. So, perhaps, some of these thoughts will be helpful.

I do believe we each have something unique to offer the world, and it’s not always an entirely new enterprise that’s called for. Sometimes we are able to make that unique contribution right where we are planted now. The challenge is to tap into that uniqueness, grow it, and get it out there. What’s your uniqueness?

Many of the shifts and advances in my own life have been preceded by an investment in learning. Taking an Entrepreneurship workshop gave me a better idea of what I’d be facing if I started a business. Participating in a Masters program shifted my focus into the balance and wellness areas. Investing time and resources in painting classes brought me the confidence to take my art to the world. Books, videos, and mentoring conversations also helped me step up and give things a shot. What do you need to learn?

“Is there room for me?” is a tough question to answer. What pops to mind is the guidance of a mentor of mine who once counseled, “You don’t need everyone, Pat, you just need enough!” And, we’ll never know if there’s enough room or enough interest until we test it out. What might you regret if you never gave it a try?

Action: If there’s a new endeavor, or a new direction lurking on your horizon, here is a starter set of questions to pause and ponder in the days ahead:

• What will you need to learn or who will you need to become to travel this road and bring this idea to life?
• Where and how could you make a learning investment in your future – in what comes next?
• What’s a first step you could take to test the waters?

Quote Of The Week: All real change begins with self change. As enterprise leaders, our capacity for organizational growth is directly proportional to our own growth. – Kevin Cashman

Resource Of The Week: Looking for a few more ideas or a bit of inspiration to help you jumpstart a new endeavor? Check out Kim Duke’s new book, “Ugly Baby – How To Get Over Fear and Give Birth To Your Odd Idea, Start A Business, Or Invent Something Cool”.

Reflection: One of life’s great frustrations and stressors is that feeling that you’re not getting anywhere. Or, if you are in motion, that you’re just spinning your wheels or going in circles.

I’ve written before about Amabile and Kramer’s work on the Progress Principle, and how motivating it can be to see evidence of moving things forward in your work and your life – to deliver on an action promise made to yourself or someone else.

With the end of the year clearly in sight, you may be asking, “Where did those last eleven months go, and why am I not further ahead with X, Y or Z?”

Part of the challenge is that life tosses a lot of distractions our way. We can easily be pulled off course responding to the new and shiny or engaging in the quick and easy. In the meantime, the high level work – the big ideas – the important pursuits – languish for want of attention.

It’s still not too late to make progress before the end of the year on something that matters to you.

Action: Here are eight actions that can help you make space for and gain traction on the high level work in your world. (I’m particularly partial to number six.) (more…)

Reflection & Action: The motto of the University of Calgary (where I studied for my Masters degree in Continuing Education) reads  “MO SHUILE TOGAM SUAS”. It’s a Gaelic phrase taken from one of the psalms. Translated, it means: “I will lift up my eyes.” What an inspired call to action!

Participants in the seminars that I lead tell me their overloaded days are often spent heads down – not eyes up. With noses to the grindstone, preoccupied with tasks and details, they wade their way through each day’s responsibilities, fretting about the details.

If that’s true for you, try shifting that practice just a smidge. As you move through your day, take a moment here and there to lift up your eyes. Step out of the car – lift up your eyes. Step out of a meeting – life up your eyes. Tune in to the bigger picture and the reason you are about to pursue the tasks at hand. There is always a broader, higher, deeper purpose. (more…)

Reflection & Action:  When I bought myself a bunch of flowers recently, the florist asked if I wanted a gift card to go with them. I declined, saying they were just for me.

“All the more reason to add a card, ” she declared. “I always write myself a card when I buy myself flowers.”

When I asked what she wrote, she replied, “Well, it depends on the day. Sometimes it’s … Thanks for being you. Other times it’s … Wow! You’re smart and gorgeous, too!”

We shared a chuckle. I left with the flowers AND a card in hand.

It was a simple reminder of an important lesson. The florist is someone who knows how to fill her own wellspring of appreciation. With her own spirits freshly topped up, she’s in a much better position to share her good will with others.

Do you take yourself for granted way too often? (more…)