learning

Reflection: For several decades now I’ve been a student of productivity, effectiveness, balance and other things related to living ‘the good life’. As you may have noticed, there is no shortage of info on this topic.

Each time I hear about a new book in this area or see a magazine with a related article, I find myself drawn to check it out. I’m always hoping that there might be a new technique, a new idea, a new strategy– an insider secret that would be helpful to me that I could share with you.

At this point in my research I often find myself more disappointed than delighted. New expressions of longstanding ideas is often the best I can find.

And that leads me to consider that what we need may not be more information, but more execution. We need to act on what we already know pays off. And that thought led me to consider, ‘What is it that works?’

Action: To boil down 30 years of digging around in this area, here is my shortlist legacy of learnings about leading a productive, balanced and meaningful life. (more…)

Reflection: Sometimes our best intentions and our everyday actions are not that well aligned.

A few cases in point:

• We say, ‘To make a long story short…’ and then we make a short story long.
• We feel virtuous about stocking up on healthy fruit and vegetables. But, do we eat them? No, we just let them waste away.
• We buy new running shoes and set up the treadmill, and then let them collect dust in the corner.
• We repeatedly show up late to appointments because there is always ‘something unexpected’ that gets in our way.

I recently led a training session for a group of leaders. They started the day by sharing how much they had been learning about the importance of being present to their staff – listening and attending with care. Many of them then proceeded to spend a big chunk of our time together flipping through messages and texting on their smart phones.

At the root of the issue is the quality of our self awareness – the ability to see ourselves as we really are. It’s an essential skill, but one that can be tough to cultivate.

Because we’re privy to our intentions – spoken and unspoken – we cut ourselves a LOT of slack. We credit ourselves with points for our good intentions and don’t deduct points for our less than ideal behaviors.

What really matters most, though, is our actions. And it is those actions that build or destroy our health or our relationships and establish our character – both on the inside and through the eyes of others.

Action: How do you get better at self awareness and alignment? (more…)

Reflection & Action: Many of my mornings begin with a walk along the beautiful South Saskatchewan River valley, just two blocks from home. My route winds past a giant boulder on the bank. It’s the perfect perch for a moment’s rest and meditation.

I recently headed out on my morning stroll, anticipating a peaceful journey. As I turned the corner and headed to the river, I discovered that some aspiring street artist had selected our fence as a perfect canvas. We’d been tagged and I was furious! Now I needed that walk more than ever.

I arrived at the river—still smoldering over the graffiti—only to make a second discovery. “My” rock had also been hit by a crew of performance artists. Broken beer bottles were their media of choice. So much for the peace of the morning. Now I was really ticked off! The nerve! The disrespect!

After two days of intermittent fuming, it finally occurred to me that I could choose another response. (more…)

Reflection: I’ve been thinking recently that I wouldn’t mind being listless for a while. I don’t mean in the traditional sense of the word: lethargic, apathetic, or weary. Nor do I mean without a list of things to do – although that would be welcome on occasion.

What I’m actually referring to is the proliferation of lists that circulate on social media and grace the covers of books and magazines everywhere. Here are a few recent examples:

• 14 Things You Should Do On Your Lunch Break Every Day
• 17 Things Extremely Happy People Say Every Day
• 18 Things Highly Creative People Do Differently
• 22 Quick Habits to Add To Your Daily Morning Routine
• 30 Things To Start Doing For Yourself – or its sister list: 30 Things To Stop Doing To Yourself

Add ‘em up. I’m exhausted just thinking about it.

I know these lists are published with the best of intentions – mostly to energize or inspire. And I grant you there is valuable advice in many of them. Heck, I’ve even created a few of these types of lists myself.

But here’s my challenge. When I spend too much time paying attention to these lists, I find myself in Tower of Pisa mode – tilted and off balance. I feel less effective and more inadequate because I’m not doing more or behaving differently.

You, too, might find yourself listing just a tad under the weight of what the advice aggregators believe we could or should be doing.

Action: With all these voices whispering instructions in your ear and putting ideas in your head, it’s hard to hear the one still quite voice that counts the most. That would be your own. (more…)

Reflection: Back in January, a local TV station asked me to share a few ideas to help people cope with Blue Monday. That’s the Monday of the last full week in January – what is referred to by many as the most depressing day of the year.

While the Blue Monday pedigree is questionable, everyone has blue days and they don’t limit themselves to the month of January!

There’s no need to hold in reserve the strategies you can use to perk up your life when you’re feeling low.

Action: Here are five actions to perk up your life any time you need a boost: (more…)

Reflection: Places to be. Things to fix. Stuff to do. The lists grow long and the burdens grow heavy.

That’s why, every so often, it helps to pause and step back from the fray – to tap into a fresh perspective on the countless should’s and pressing have-to’s of our lives.

In my presentations on balance and renewal, I often challenge participants with an exercise that invites them to generate their own life wisdom and insights. I invite you to take ten minutes and give it a try yourself. Here’s how the exercise goes.

Action: On a blank sheet of paper, write the date and year of your 80^th birthday. (Hopefully you won’t need a calculator to figure it out!)

Next, bring to mind a ten-year-old boy or girl sitting at your knee looking up at you with admiration. Give that child a name – real or fictional. Imagine the youngster saying, “You’ve lived a VERY long time. What can you tell me about what really matters in life?”

Your task is to put pen to paper starting with the words:

Dear (insert his/her name), You’ve asked me to tell you what really matters in life. Here’s what I’ve learned so far…

Give yourself ten minutes to jot down every idea that pops into your mind. (more…)

Reflection: If you happened to view any of the three short videos I shared while the regular Pause ezine was on hiatus, you would have caught one or more messages about the value of stepping back to step ahead. Just in case you missed it or them, today I’m sharing a ‘summing up’ and a link to the complete article.

I have come to understand that nonstop action is a dead end strategy for success. When we nix time-outs, we just hit the wall – not the mark. Sometimes we really do have to step back to step ahead. Making the most of our days involves building strategic pauses into everyday experiences.

When we step back, stand down and chill out, we tap more readily into renewal, appreciation and perspective.

Action: Here are nine (3 x 3) pause practices that will help you generate more energy, enthusiasm and insight. (more…)

 Reflection: I don’t know about you, but I like to start my day with a hot cup of coffee. Well, truth be known, I like to sip coffee all day long. Decaf – for the most part – so I’m not jangling from a high wire by high noon.

This morning I set the coffee to drip as usual, and went about getting my day started elsewhere in the house. Hearing the beep that signaled the coffee was ready, I returned to the kitchen to pour my first cuppa java. What I discovered was an empty pot and a kitchen counter covered from one end to the other in a slick of steaming brown liquid. Apparently the flow-through flap on the pot lid jammed, and the coffee had nowhere to go but over the top.

Cleaning up a swill-spill was not how I’d planned to start my day – especially before my first cup of coffee. I muttered a few choice words as I mopped up the mess.

I also recognized the situation as one of life’s moments of choice. I could feed my frustration, let the annoyance overflow, seeping into the rest of the day like the coffee itself; or I could take things in stride and let it go.

Action: At the root of our frustrations about life’s unexpected challenges lies a quirky little belief that we’re somehow entitled to a world that runs smoothly all day every day. In fact, speed bumps, detours and breakdowns are a normal part of life. The real challenge is to keep it all in perspective.

Here are five ways to let it go and sidestep a frustration hangover that can set a downer tone for the rest of the day. (I used all of these this morning!) (more…)

Reflection: As I was reviewing the Pause reader suggestions for topics to cover in future editions, this question caught my eye: “How do I find the courage to start a new endeavor? I’m wanting to start my own business. When I see that others are already doing what I want to do, does that mean there’s no room for me?”

Now, I know that not all of you are thinking of starting a new business. However, I have a serious hunch that every single one of you is toying with an idea, a pursuit, or a new endeavor of some kind that is nudging you to bring it to life. It’s a similar conundrum. So, perhaps, some of these thoughts will be helpful.

I do believe we each have something unique to offer the world, and it’s not always an entirely new enterprise that’s called for. Sometimes we are able to make that unique contribution right where we are planted now. The challenge is to tap into that uniqueness, grow it, and get it out there. What’s your uniqueness?

Many of the shifts and advances in my own life have been preceded by an investment in learning. Taking an Entrepreneurship workshop gave me a better idea of what I’d be facing if I started a business. Participating in a Masters program shifted my focus into the balance and wellness areas. Investing time and resources in painting classes brought me the confidence to take my art to the world. Books, videos, and mentoring conversations also helped me step up and give things a shot. What do you need to learn?

“Is there room for me?” is a tough question to answer. What pops to mind is the guidance of a mentor of mine who once counseled, “You don’t need everyone, Pat, you just need enough!” And, we’ll never know if there’s enough room or enough interest until we test it out. What might you regret if you never gave it a try?

Action: If there’s a new endeavor, or a new direction lurking on your horizon, here is a starter set of questions to pause and ponder in the days ahead:

• What will you need to learn or who will you need to become to travel this road and bring this idea to life?
• Where and how could you make a learning investment in your future – in what comes next?
• What’s a first step you could take to test the waters?

Quote Of The Week: All real change begins with self change. As enterprise leaders, our capacity for organizational growth is directly proportional to our own growth. – Kevin Cashman

Resource Of The Week: Looking for a few more ideas or a bit of inspiration to help you jumpstart a new endeavor? Check out Kim Duke’s new book, “Ugly Baby – How To Get Over Fear and Give Birth To Your Odd Idea, Start A Business, Or Invent Something Cool”.