Will you? Would you? Can you? Could you? On those short questions hang the hooks of overcommitment. Will you take on this project? Would you look after the kids for the weekend? Could you chair this committee?
The trap lies in believing there’s only a yes or no answer to each question.
Say “yes” and when you realize you don’t have time for the task or that it’s not a fit with your interests or priorities, you reward yourself with resentment. Say “no” and when you suffer second thoughts about the wisdom of your decision or its possible effect on your relationships or future, you reward yourself with guilt.
People often overlook the possibility of middle ground. Maybe you would feel comfortable taking on the project if you could shift other deadlines. Maybe you would take the kids on Friday or Saturday night but not for the whole weekend. Maybe you won’t chair the committee, but you would help recruit someone who will.
The search for middle ground starts with a time out. By stepping back from the request, thinking about the impact, looking at priorities and schedules, you may be able to find one option or several that aren’t based on guilt or resentment. Look for commitments you can make with a willing heart. Find ways you can help and still be “sustainably” productive over the long haul.
Middle ground runs wide and deep. It’s rich with possibilities for reasonable loads and healthy relationships.
_________________________
QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“Resentment is an extremely bitter diet, and eventually poisonous. I have no desire to make my own toxins.” – Neil Kinnock
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READERS WRITE:
“The year I was president of two organizations was frustrating. Both held their monthly board meetings on the same Tuesday-one from 4:00 to 6:00 p.m. and the other starting at 7:00 p.m. When my traveling husband was in town, the tight schedule was not too much of a problem. However one day when my husband couldn’t be home, I had to arrange for one babysitter to pick up my daughter from another babysitter, take her home, and stay with her until I could get home about 10:00 p.m. At that point, I found the backbone to say ‘no’ to some of the requests that came my way.” – Debby C.
“When I’m asked for something that requires my time, I simply say, ‘I want to think about it. I’ll get back to you.’ This gives me time to recover from the shock of another request and see if it fits in my calendar. I wear the idea awhile, see what it feels like, see which way I lean, and make a decision. When I say ‘yes,’ I really mean it!” – Denise N.
REFLECTION & ACTION: Will you? Would you? Can you? Could you? On those short questions hang the hooks of overcommitment. Will you take on this project? Would you look after the kids for the weekend? Could you chair this committee?
The trap lies in believing there’s only a yes or no answer to each question.
Say “yes” and when you realize you don’t have time for the task or that it’s not a fit with your interests or priorities, you reward yourself with resentment. Say “no” and when you suffer second thoughts about the wisdom of your decision or its possible effect on your relationships or future, you reward yourself with guilt.
People often overlook the possibility of middle ground. (more…)
PAUSE – Pause Gem #4- Sanity Policies
July 26, 2011
REFLECTION & ACTION:
In the early years of my business, I worked many weekends and often delivered an all-day seminar followed by an evening presentation. As burnout loomed, I chose a policy of working just one weekend a month, speaking and training no more than three days a week, and presenting in only two out of three time slots on a given day (morning, afternoon, or evening).
My productivity and energy soared. Amazingly, so did my profits. Clearly, taking care of myself was also good for my business.
Community service is another area where overload shifts the experience from blessing to burden. How many community groups can you serve at a time and still feel enthused as you head out the door to another evening meeting?
If you’re frustrated en route, you’ll feel less than enthusiastic at the meeting itself. Rest assured, if you don’t want to be there and can’t wait to get away, you aren’t the ray of sunshine that will brighten the day for others.
Know yourself. Draw your lines in the sand. Stand by your decisions. Set your own sanity policies for paid and volunteer work. Stake your claim. Make time for renewal and relaxation. It’ll help you stay productive and enthused so you can make a positive contribution over the long term.
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QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“If there are one hundred good things to do and you can only do ten of them, you will have to say no ninety times.” – Richard Swenson
“A ‘no’ uttered from the deepest conviction is better than a ‘yes’ merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble.” – Mahatma Gandhi
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READERS WRITE:
“I decided to give up volunteering. It sounds terrible but I’m 34 years old, work part-time, and have two sons who are seven and ten. My children are busy with music and sports and my husband works long hours and coaches in our sons’ hockey organizations. This leaves me to run all aspects of our home life. I felt pressure to volunteer-to do my part. But I didn’t enjoy it. As a result, I didn’t put forward a proper effort or attitude. I decided that my job is raising my two sons to be happy, well-rounded young men. They’ll remember sharing time with their mother who was there when they needed her, not at some meeting. There will be lots of time to volunteer when my sons are grown. I feel positive that I’ve set a good boundary!” – Tiffany J.S.
REFLECTION & ACTION: In the early years of my business, I worked many weekends and often delivered an all-day seminar followed by an evening presentation. As burnout loomed, I chose a policy of working just one weekend a month, speaking and training no more than three days a week, and presenting in only two out of three time slots on a given day (morning, afternoon, or evening).
My productivity and energy soared. Amazingly, so did my profits. Clearly, taking care of myself was also good for my business.
Community service is another area where overload shifts the experience from blessing to burden. How many community groups can you serve at a time and still feel enthused as you head out the door to another evening meeting?
If you’re frustrated en route, you’ll feel less than enthusiastic at the meeting itself. Rest assured, if you don’t want to be there and can’t wait to get away, you aren’t the ray of sunshine that will brighten the day for others. (more…)
PAUSE – Pause Gem #2- White Space
July 12, 2011
REFLECTION & ACTION:
Ask people about their most satisfying experiences with time. You might be surprised by their answers. Yes, the pleasure of accomplishment-getting projects done and checking tasks off lists-ranks high. However, you’ll find that the experience of unstructured, wide-open chunks of time with no planned activities consistently tops the list.
It’s refreshing to have an hour, an afternoon, or a day to putter and ramble-to go where the spirit moves you, not feeling pressured to be anywhere or do anything in particular. Think of this as white space on your calendar-a wide-open chunk of time with no special commitments or duties.
It’s a time when you could invite that new colleague for coffee and conversation or dip into the professional reading that’s been piling up in the corner of your office. You might lean over the fence and visit with the neighbors. You could play a round of Monopoly with the kids or snuggle up on the couch with your partner. You could curl up in a hammock with a good book. Or you could simply do nothing at all.
In traditional religious practice, the keeping of the Sabbath assures this recurring openness of time and space. The Sabbath is unique because you don’t earn it. It rolls around whether you’re ready for it or not.
You can build white space into your work and personal life-for rest, renewal, relationship or adventure-whether or not it’s part of your own tradition. Set a policy of an hour, an afternoon, or an evening each week as open time with no commitments. See what unfolds and develops. Soak up the joy and sense of ease you reap from the experience.
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QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“Will I remember that the hammock looked good hanging on the front porch or that the garden looked good from the hammock?” – LuAnn Brandsen
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READERS WRITE:
“Because my life seems to be so scheduled with deadlines and dates, I find my most satisfying experiences come when I have blocks in which time doesn’t matter-like a day I can do what I feel like doing when I want or a vacation with no structure at all. During these times, I enjoy breaking the ‘rules’ of time. If I want to walk in my garden in my pajamas at 2:00 in the afternoon, I do it, and I relish the fact that I’m breaking a ‘rule.’ If I want to build a sandcastle at 7:00 in the morning I will, and I dare anyone to tell me it’s too early to play on the beach! I’ll even work on my stained-glass project until 4:00 in the morning because it’s my time.”
– Dani V.D.
“Late one windless night, with the clear sky brimming with stars, I sat by the barbeque roasting red peppers, a relaxing, carefree release from the norm. Feeling something odd, I noticed there wasn’t a sound except the gentle hissing of the barbeque and the popping of the peppers. In our increasingly noisy lives, it was enchanting, peaceful, and somewhat scary to feel and hear the sound of silence.”
– Gregg H.
REFLECTION & ACTION: Ask people about their most satisfying experiences with time. You might be surprised by their answers. Yes, the pleasure of accomplishment-getting projects done and checking tasks off lists-ranks high. However, you’ll find that the experience of unstructured, wide-open chunks of time with no planned activities is right up there, too.
It’s refreshing to have an hour, an afternoon, or a day to putter and ramble-to go where the spirit moves you, not feeling pressured to be anywhere or do anything in particular. Think of this as white space on your calendar-a wide-open chunk of time with no special commitments or duties.
It’s a time when you could invite that new colleague for coffee and conversation or dip into the professional reading that’s been piling up in the corner of your office. You might lean over the fence and visit with the neighbors. You could play a round of Monopoly with the kids or snuggle up on the couch with your partner. You could curl up in a hammock with a good book. Or you could simply do nothing at all. (more…)
PAUSE – 11.29 – Recess-itation
June 14, 2011
REFLECTION:
Remember recess? Racing to the ball diamond for a game of scratch, hoping you were quick enough to nab your spot in line so you’d actually get a turn at bat before the bell rang? Dashing to the swings to pump yourself up with no teacher telling you to sit still and quit fidgeting? Screaming at the top of your lungs, “Red Rover, Red Rover, let Jimmy come over!” Or maybe just spending a quiet moment chatting with a buddy, trading secrets?
Now that we are no longer stuck in elementary school, and so much more adult, we’ve outgrown the need for recess. Or have we? Survey after survey reports that people who take a break from their daily routine to engage in activities that help them emotionally blow off steam, physically rest, socially reconnect, or mentally regroup are not only more relaxed and more engaged, but also much more productive.
Need a refresher on the research? Check out a few of the stats on the ‘What’s The Plus?’ page of the Why Balance? section of the Pauseworks Balance Centre.
ACTION:
So, if recess is part of our past, but the need for it is still present, what’s a body to do? The Big Kid, Rich DiGorilamo, suggests we resurrect the past and put it to work in the service of the present. In simple terms: Bring Back Recess.
Rich is the founder of Recess At Work Day – a day to make time to recharge and enjoy each other’s company. Scheduled for the third Thursday in June, this year, Recess At Work Day happens to fall on June 16. That would be … tomorrow! That still gives you 24 hours to scheme up an engaging break for you and your colleagues.
What to do? There are plenty of possibilities. Here are a few that spring to mind:
Balloons (animal twists or hand badminton challenge)
In-House Lemonade Stand (to raise $ for your fav charity)
Joke Swap (all in good taste of course)
Ice Cream Cones or Sundaes (complete with a cool selection of toppings)
Color Off (a new box of crayons and flip chart paper for each team)
Outdoors Meeting (Remember trying to convince your teacher to hold class outside?)
Juke Box Coffee Break (oldies tunes and specialty coffees)
Your ideas here: ………, ………, ………..
It doesn’t have to be expensive; and it doesn’t have to be complicated. Recess was never either of those things! Think simple, impromptu, easy, and fun.
Give it a try and let me know how it goes! I’ll be teetering and tottering, waiting for your reports!
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QUOTES OF THE WEEK:
“A three year old child is a being who gets almost as much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as it does out of finding a small green worm.” – Bill Vaughan
“You can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation” – Plato.
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RESOURCE OF THE WEEK:
For more info and inspiration on Recess At Work Day, check out Rich’s website.
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READERS WRITE:
Pause Reader LV writes: “I needed you today and all I had to do was open up my newsletter…thanks.”
To which I would reply, “You are more than welcome, LV and all of you. It’s a treat to share these insights, ideas and tools with you each week. I’m delighted when you find them useful, and even more delighted when you let me know.”
REFLECTION: Remember recess? Racing to the ball diamond for a game of scratch, hoping you were quick enough to nab your spot in line so you’d actually get a turn at bat before the bell rang? Dashing to the swings to pump yourself up with no teacher telling you to sit still and quit fidgeting? Screaming at the top of your lungs, “Red Rover, Red Rover, let Jimmy come over!” Or maybe just spending a quiet moment chatting with a buddy, trading secrets?
Now that we are no longer stuck in elementary school, and so much more adult, we’ve outgrown the need for recess. Or have we? Survey after survey reports that people who take a break from their daily routine to engage in activities that help them emotionally blow off steam, physically rest, socially reconnect, or mentally regroup are not only more relaxed and more engaged, but also much more productive.
Need a refresher on the research? Check out a few of the stats on the ‘What’s The Plus?’ page of the Why Balance? section of the Pauseworks Balance Centre.
ACTION: So, if recess is part of our past, but the need for it is still present, what’s a body to do? The Big Kid, Rich DiGorilamo, suggests we resurrect the past and put it to work in the service of the present. In simple terms: Bring Back Recess. (more…)
PAUSE – 11.28 – Take The 33:30 Challenge
June 7, 2011
REFLECTION: I love it when seminar and conference participants share their stories and struggles with balance. It helps ease the pressure for us to hear of each other’s challenges and to know we’re not alone in our wacky responses to life’s stresses.
At a recent conference, I shared a few examples of the crazymaking things people do in their attempts to speed their way through the overloaded demands of the day. (If you’d like a refresher on this, check out my ‘Crazymaking World’ video clip on the Pauseworks website. )
During the morning break it was attendee Carol’s turn to make me laugh. She told me that when she wants to give something a half a minute in the microwave she punches in 33 seconds. She swears it’s faster to punch the same digit twice than to waste time looking for the 3 and the 0! I’m pretty sure 33 would be slightly faster. But the real question of importance is: “Does it make life slightly better?”
Carol also responded to a vignette I’d relayed of a busy parent screaming through the front door at day’s end – kicking backpacks and jackets out of the way and shouting out homework and supper instructions to the kids. Apparently this had been her style of re-entry, too, until the day her teenager asked, “Mom, do you walk through the door yelling even when there’s no one home?”
It was one of those ‘hold the mirror’, ‘dagger to the heart’ moments that caused Carol to stop and take a closer look at herself through the eyes of those who matter most. (more…)
PAUSE – 11.27 – A Refocusing Trio Of Q’s
May 31, 2011
REFLECTION:
How do you know you’re racing your engine too fast? When you stop at a red light, discover you can’t remember where you were going or why, and have to pull over to call home and be reminded just what errand you are running. That’s a true experience shared by a participant in one of my recent ‘Take a Break & Get A Grip’ conference presentations.
He is way too young to slough the experience off as a ‘senior moment’. And, of course, a ‘one-of’ experience like this does not confirm early-onset Alzheimers. But…it could well be an indicator light on the dashboard of life suggesting it’s time to slow down, tune in, and focus on the task at hand.
ACTION:
The next time you start racing to and fro, speeding along with very little conscious direction or intent, jot this trio of questions on a brightly colored post-it note. Place it where you’ll be challenged to Press Pause & Think Again – and ultimately respond in more thoughtful, ‘present-to-the-moment’ ways.
What now?
Where to?
Why this?
The questions in this simple reflective focusing tool can help you tune in and keep your wits about you when you find yourself revved up and maxed out by life in the fast lane.
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QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“We will be more successful in all our endeavors if we can let go of the habit of running all the time, and take little pauses to relax and re-center ourselves. We’ll also have a lot more joy in living.” – Thich Nhat Hanh
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RESOURCE OF THE WEEK:
Check out Marianne Schnall’s article, In Times of Outer-World Overload, Take an Inner Time-Out at http://www.huffingtonpost.com/marianne-schnall/inner-time-out_b_862427.html
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READERS WRITE:
In response to my most recent message, The Burden of Bundling, Pause reader JO writes: Your article reminded me of how systems thinking can help clarify when you are in overwhelm. Everything is related to some extent in a system. We as people are interdependent. Issues in groups or teams can show up in certain places but the root cause may be somewhere else. When things get jumbled in my mind, I use this as a signal to switch from a breakdown mode to a systems mode to see the broader and more holistic picture. Rather than overwhelm, this focus on the system dynamic helps me clarify.
REFLECTION: How do you know you’re racing your engine too fast? When you stop at a red light, you can’t remember where you are going or why, and have to pull over to call home and be reminded just what errand you are running. That’s a true experience shared by a participant in one of my recent ‘Take a Break & Get A Grip’ conference presentations.
He is way too young to attribute the experience to a ‘senior moment’. And, of course, a ‘one-of’ experience like this does not suggest early-onset Alzheimers. But…it could well be an indicator light on the dashboard of life suggesting it’s time to slow down, tune in, and focus on the task at hand.
ACTION: The next time you start racing to and fro, speeding along with very little conscious direction or intent, jot this trio of questions on a brightly colored post-it note. (more…)
PAUSE – 11.26 – The Burden of Bundling
May 24, 2011
REFLECTION:
These days, merchandisers are pretty adept at bundling goods and services together in the hopes of extending one purchase into a bigger payday. A telecom will sell you a phone line and then bundle in internet service, cell phone, and unlimited long distance. At our Canadian Tim Horton’s you can purchase chili and a bun with coffee – and for another 14 cents Timmy tosses in a donut. Bundle! Bundle! Bundle!
Bundling CAN create good deals. And yet, as much of a bargain as it may be financially, bundling can also bring you more than you need or want, more than you bargained for, or, literally, more than you can chew.
The concept of bundling popped to mind as I recently listened to a colleague fret about a complicated workplace problem. It was clear that by taking one issue and bundling it together with others she was making the situation more difficult and overwhelming than it needed to be. On top of the precipitating problem with Employee A, she had layered an ongoing performance concern about Colleague B, and was already anticipating having to deal with the fallout of the situation on Employees C & D.
Truly, she had legitimate concerns in all three areas; and all would have to be addressed at some point. However, bundling them together in the moment had sent her into a tail spin. It made things much more difficult than they needed to be in dealing with the single precipitating issue. And, the resulting confusion of thoughts caused a crisis of confidence.
Once we unbundled the issues – clarified her approach to the immediate problem, identified a first step in addressing the ongoing issue, and set the third issue aside for later – calm and confidence were restored. I know she’ll excel at handling everything. She just didn’t need to worry it all at once.
ACTION:
It’s so easy for related issues to bounce around our minds, bumping into each other, bruising our ability to see clearly and think straight.
That’s when and where it’s helpful to divvy the whole mess into more manageable chunks, and determine a thoughtful order of approach.
Another mind or another person’s point of view – especially that of someone not directly involved in the situation – can be helpful.
The next time you find yourself caught up in a burdensome bundle of confusion, pause. Take a step back. Call on a bit of help. And together have a go at unbundling the situation into its much more manageable pieces.
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QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once.” – Jennifer Yane
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RESOURCE OF THE WEEK:
You might enjoy Kathy Gulrich’s article, “Overwhelm: Love It Or Leave It” at: http://www.smartlearningcenter.com/article_overwhelm.html Kathy offers five strategies for finding your way through the burden of overwhelm.
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READERS WRITE:
In response to last week’s message, Regrets – A Lost Cause, Pause reader GS writes: ” Your story about the article on the bus-lines of Paris struck a chord with me. I can’t begin to count the number of times I’ve had a similar experience after a trip. Finally, I realized that I was just being reminded that I had a “button” that said I was afraid about what I might have missed out on. Now, when I find something about a place I’ve just been to, I file it under “future trips”. And, I do like you suggested: relish what I had experienced.”
REFLECTION: These days, merchandisers are pretty adept at bundling goods and services together in the hopes of extending one purchase into a bigger payday. A telecom will sell you a phone line and then bundle in internet service, cell phone, and unlimited long distance. At our Canadian Tim Horton’s you can purchase chili and a bun with coffee – and for another 14 cents Timmy tosses in a donut. Bundle! Bundle! Bundle!
Bundling CAN create good deals. And yet, as much of a bargain as it may be financially, bundling can also bring you more than you need or want, more than you bargained for, or, literally, more than you can chew.
The concept of bundling popped to mind as I recently listened to a colleague fret about a complicated workplace problem. It was clear that by taking one issue and bundling it together with others she was making the situation more difficult and overwhelming than it needed to be. On top of the precipitating problem with Employee A, she had layered an ongoing performance concern about Colleague B, and was already anticipating having to deal with the fallout of the situation on Employees C & D.
Truly, she had legitimate concerns in all three areas; and all would have to be addressed at some point. However, bundling them together in the moment had sent her into a tail spin. (more…)
PAUSE -11.23- Overwork: An Artful Life Perspective
April 5, 2011
REFLECTION:
An experienced artist recently shared a few thoughts about overworking in response to a question from a novice painter. Although, the conversation centered on the negative impact of overworking a piece of art, as the discussion unfolded, I couldn’t help but notice the parallels between art and life.
The mentoring artist noted five causes of overwork:
– repeatedly going back over old ground rather than leaving well enough alone and moving on
– pushing for perfection – spending time and energy on final finishing touches that don’t add appreciable value
– forcing the work – letting impatience over-ride the flow of the paint, the brush or the pen
– overusing a well developed skill when it’s not even called for in the work of the moment
– getting caught up in the fine detail without stopping to step back for the long view and gaining perspective
ACTION:
It seems to me that we might take a page or two from the Old Masters and put them to work in our everyday work-lives.
When you find yourself challenged by overwork, take stock of these questions and see if they shift your behavior:
– Does the extra effort advance something important – or just cover old ground in another way?
– Is the task already done well enough to meet the basic needs? Would the extra 10% of effort be warranted in terms of the result?
– Mihgt you be pushing people and progress in ways that create unnecessary resistance?
– Could you be engaging in tasks just because you have polished the skill to do them – not because they’re the best use of your time at the moment, or required by the enterprise at hand?
– Have you stepped back to take a look at the big picture, or are you trapped by the minutiae of the moment?
It could be that in pausing for reflection you just might find that the extra effort isn’t necessary, or that you just hadn’t realized you were already there. Give it a whirl and see how it works.
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QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“Art is the elimination of the unnecessary.” – Pablo Picasso.
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RESOURCE OF THE WEEK:
For a few additional thoughts on Overwork and Overwhelm, see this article on CanadaJobs.com at: http://www.canadajobs.com/articles/viewarticle.cfm?ArticleID=1253
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READERS WRITE:
In response to last week’s message, Game Changing Questions, Pause reader B writes: “Another Pause meant just for me at this time! I have just returned from celebrating the life of my sister – a life cut short in her prime by cancer. She also was someone who engaged and challenged people. The 700+ who attended the celebration of her life were a testament to that. She was so different from me and had many characteristics that I admire and am trying to keep present and emulate, including engaging others with meaningful questions! Thanks – Pause is an integral part of my week.”
REFLECTION: An experienced artist recently shared a few thoughts about overworking in response to a question from a novice painter. Although, the conversation centered on the negative impact of overworking a piece of art, as the discussion unfolded, I couldn’t help but notice the parallels between art and life.
The mentoring artist noted five causes of overwork:
Repeatedly going back over old ground rather than leaving well enough alone and moving on
Striving for perfection – spending time and energy on final finishing touches that don’t add appreciable value
Forcing the work – letting impatience over-ride the flow of the paint, the brush or the pen
Overusing a well developed skill when it’s not even called for in the work of the moment
Getting caught up in the fine detail without stopping to step back for the long view and gaining perspective
ACTION: It seems to me that we might take a page or two from the Old Masters and put them to work in our everyday work-lives.
When you find yourself challenged by overwork, take stock of these questions and see if they shift your behavior: (more…)
PAUSE – 11.21 – Rest
March 22, 2011
REFLECTION:
No doubt you’ve been following the reports on the tragic earthquake, tsunami, and nuclear disaster in Japan. Apparently, one of the most credible voices offering news updates in Japan is chief cabinet secretary, Yukio Edano.
Mr. Edano broadcasts reports on the latest developments an average of five times a day – at all hours of the day and night. His listening audience is growing concerned about his health. They’re noting his tussled hair, beads of sweat on his brow, tired eyes, and a growing weariness in his expression. They’re expressing their concerns via postings on Twitter encouraging Mr. Edano to step away and get some sleep.
ACTION:
Thankfully, few of us are facing challenges as severe as the nation of Japan. Still, we may find ourselves concerned about those nearer at hand who are dangerously overextending themselves for much lesser reasons – risking health and well-being in the process. It could be that we even see one of those people when we look in the mirror in the morning.
How about following the lead of the concerned Japanese? Take or make an opportunity to reach out in concern, encouraging time for renewal when none is being taken. Encouragement could take the form of wise counsel, an invitation to step briefly away for rest or refreshment, or an offer to lend a hand and lift the load.
Zest without rest is a short-term strategy with long-term consequences.
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QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“Work when there is work to do. Rest when you are tired. One thing done in peace will most likely be better than ten things done in panic….I am not a hero if I deny rest; I am only tired.” – Susan McHenry
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RESOURCE OF THE WEEK:
For more on Sleep Debt, see this article from Scientific American: Can You Catch Up On Lost Sleep? at http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=fact-or-fiction-can-you-catch-up-on-sleep
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READERS WRITE:
In response to last week’s message, Surviving Mini Marathon, Pause reader YD writes: Interesting epiphany this morning for me. I’m a trail runner – a long distance trail runner – that’s the sport I love. It’s my frustration burning strategy, my creative / self-connection / meditation / self-love time. Over the years, I’ve developed ways to take care of my body: proper eating, yoga, stretching, sleeping, massage, taper period, etc. I’ve developed many routines to get up the day after, ready to hit the trail again.
I’m also a ‘long distance’ runner at WORK. But I realize now I don’t really have effective ways to take care of me – ways to get up the next day ready to run again. And maybe, just maybe, I should cut down on the distance I ‘run’ at work.
REFLECTION: No doubt you’ve been following the reports on the tragic earthquake, tsunami, and nuclear disaster in Japan. Apparently, one of the most credible voices offering news updates in Japan is Chief Cabinet Secretary, Yukio Edano.
Mr. Edano broadcasts reports on the latest developments an average of five times a day – at all hours of the day and night. His listening audience is growing concerned about his health. They’re noting his tussled hair, beads of sweat on his brow, tired eyes, and a growing weariness in his expression.
They’re expressing their concerns via postings on Twitter encouraging Mr. Edano to step away and get some sleep. (more…)
PAUSE – 11.20 – Surviving Mini-Marathons
March 15, 2011
REFLECTION: Have you run any mini-marathons lately? Not the athletic type – just the plain old challenging lifestyle version.
I’ve just come through an especially active couple of weeks, myself. During the first ten days of March, I was on my feet speaking at conferences and facilitating seminars for seven of those days. Two days each included an opening keynote and three follow up sessions – for a total of 13 individual presentations during that span of time. I usually limit myself to no more than two or three days of presenting each week, so this was extraordinarily compressed.
No one forced me to book this work in this way. As someone who is self employed, I’m directly responsible for what makes its way on to my calendar. This time around I agreed to this number of sessions because: the travel and timing pieces fit well together, the work itself was very appealing, I knew I could carve out prep time in advance and set aside recovery time at the end of the run, and because I’m aware that an upcoming planned get-away will limit available spring programming days.
Yes, there were surprises – crazy weather and dental emergencies amongst them. (more…)
REFLECTION & ACTION: Will you? Would you? Can you? Could you? On those short questions hang the hooks of overcommitment. Will you take on this project? Would you look after the kids for the weekend? Could you chair this committee?
REFLECTION & ACTION: Ask people about their most satisfying experiences with time. You might be surprised by their answers. Yes, the pleasure of accomplishment-getting projects done and checking tasks off lists-ranks high. However, you’ll find that the experience of unstructured, wide-open chunks of time with no planned activities is right up there, too.
REFLECTION: Remember recess? Racing to the ball diamond for a game of scratch, hoping you were quick enough to nab your spot in line so you’d actually get a turn at bat before the bell rang? Dashing to the swings to pump yourself up with no teacher telling you to sit still and quit fidgeting? Screaming at the top of your lungs, “Red Rover, Red Rover, let Jimmy come over!” Or maybe just spending a quiet moment chatting with a buddy, trading secrets?
REFLECTION: I love it when seminar and conference participants share their stories and struggles with balance. It helps ease the pressure for us to hear of each other’s challenges and to know we’re not alone in our wacky responses to life’s stresses.
REFLECTION: How do you know you’re racing your engine too fast? When you stop at a red light, you can’t remember where you are going or why, and have to pull over to call home and be reminded just what errand you are running. That’s a true experience shared by a participant in one of my recent ‘Take a Break & Get A Grip’ conference presentations.
REFLECTION: These days, merchandisers are pretty adept at bundling goods and services together in the hopes of extending one purchase into a bigger payday. A telecom will sell you a phone line and then bundle in internet service, cell phone, and unlimited long distance. At our Canadian Tim Horton’s you can purchase chili and a bun with coffee – and for another 14 cents Timmy tosses in a donut. Bundle! Bundle! Bundle!
REFLECTION: An experienced artist recently shared a few thoughts about overworking in response to a question from a novice painter. Although, the conversation centered on the negative impact of overworking a piece of art, as the discussion unfolded, I couldn’t help but notice the parallels between art and life.
REFLECTION: No doubt you’ve been following the reports on the tragic earthquake, tsunami, and nuclear disaster in Japan. Apparently, one of the most credible voices offering news updates in Japan is Chief Cabinet Secretary, Yukio Edano.
REFLECTION: Have you run any mini-marathons lately? Not the athletic type – just the plain old challenging lifestyle version.