REFLECTION: More than one study has confirmed that backlogs are an everyday fact of life in today’s overcommitted workplaces – not to mention on the home and community fronts. Despite the fact that we have an inordinate number of irons in the fire at any one time, that doesn’t seem to prevent us from adding more.
Personally, I’ve got a tall stack of books waiting for my attention. That hasn’t stopped me from firing off orders to Amazon or Chapters for yet another interesting volume or two. I’ve got a number of articles partly written, and program ideas partially developed. That doesn’t stop me from grabbing another scrap of paper and scratching out a few thoughts about yet another fresh idea. Over the years, I’ve registered a number of web domain names that seemed like an inspired idea at the time, and then let them languish for lack of attention.
REFLECTION: Last week marked a significant change in my extended family, as my parents moved from their home on the farm into a brand new residence in Saskatoon. My Dad was born in that farmhouse 85 years ago. He lived and worked there for most of his life. My Mom joined him on the farm when they married 60 years ago.
Together they raised a family of six girls, who eventually brought home husbands, grandchildren and more recently great-grandchildren. This last December, 29 of us gathered in that small one-bathroom farm house – all very much aware of the significance of one more Christmas at the farm. The roots run deep and the memories run wide.
The relocation was in the works for a few months. That time was filled with plenty of planning, choosing and deciding. Recent weeks were especially rich in emotion – as years of memorabilia was sifted and sorted – and everyone faced the now near and new realities of a change of place.
We’re definitely not alone in facing change. Every single one of you is dealing with or has dealt with changes of one kind or another – jobs, relationships, living situations, and more. (more…)
PAUSE – 11.17 – Aversion To Stillness
February 22, 2011
REFLECTION:
An aversion to stillness is a growing phenomenon in our plugged in world.
Case in point. I recently facilitated a day in a leadership development program. During the day we were in and out of group work and discussion.
People were pretty conscientious about turning off their cell phone ringers and setting the gadgets to vibrate. So the ‘audible call-out’ distractions were minimized. However, that didn’t stop people from repeatedly reaching for their phones in much the same way as infants reach for their pacifiers – to plug into something that fills the void.
As soon as group discussion wound down, or a break was announced, people grabbed their phones to check on the world outside. This essentially cut out those to their left and right who might want to engage in further interaction. After all, who wants to get between someone and their phone. However, it also robbed the individual of the opportunity to be still with their own thoughts – in the absence of input from the outside world. Who knows what kind of insights might have arisen given half a chance to see the light of day?
An article in last week’s Globe and Mail (see Resource of the Week) describes software that will, in return for your cash, shut down your internet access for a predetermined period of time. For $15 the Anti Social application will turn off your access to social media sites for a time of your choosing. For $10 the Freedom application will keep you from accessing ANY part of the web for up to eight hours.
Has it really come to this that we are so undisciplined – so addicted to input from elsewhere – that we are willing to pay others to handcuff us – to stop us from grasping incessantly for the technology in our lives?
ACTION:
Try taking the ‘Aversion To Stillness’ challenge. See how easy you find it to sit still and do nothing for a full two minutes. Visit: http://www.donothingfor2minutes.com/
What does your success or lack thereof say about your ability to be calmly, totally present to your self and to the moment? Are you pleased with the message?
_________________________
QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“Presence is more than just being there.” – Malcolm S. Forbes
In response to last week’s message, ‘Easily Pleased’, Pause reader June F writes: This reminded me of a conversation that I recently had with my Mom. We were chatting about my Grandfather. She was saying how she still held a grudge of sorts with him because a few times when I was a child (probably going back 30 years now) he had promised to take me to the farm with him, and then he hadn’t shown up. I was shocked, and told her so. I had no recollection of the times that he didn’t show up; but I had such great memories of the times that he did. I’m sure I may have been briefly disappointed as a child. But that disappointment didn’t last long as I moved onto something else to occupy my time and delight myself. Children have such an amazing resilience. I try to remember this each day as I come across something that I could let disappoint me. Usually it’s not worth the time moping about. I quickly move on to something that will bring me joy. Thanks for this reminder to keep this attitude each day.
REFLECTION: An aversion to stillness is a growing phenomenon in our plugged in world.
Case in point. I recently facilitated a day in a leadership development program. The session focused on Modeling The Way & Encouraging the Heart – two essential leadership practices. During the day we were in and out of group work and discussion.
People were pretty conscientious about turning off their cell phone ringers and setting the gadgets to vibrate. So the ‘audible call-out’ distractions were minimized. However, that didn’t stop people from repeatedly reaching for their phones in much the same way as infants reach for their pacifiers – to plug into something that fills the void.
As soon as group discussion wound down, or a break was announced, people grabbed their phones to check on the world outside. This essentially cut out those to their left and right who might want to engage in further interaction. After all, who wants to get between someone and their phone. However, it also robbed the individual of the opportunity to be still with their own thoughts – in the absence of input from the outside world. Who knows what kind of insights might have arisen given half a chance to see the light of day? (more…)
PAUSE – 11.16 – Easily Pleased
February 15, 2011
REFLECTION: Over the years, I’ve grown to enjoy the ‘one a day’ practice. I’m not talking about an apple a day keeping the doctor away, or a one-a-day vitamin to keep the body ticking along. I’m referring to what are often called Day Books. They’re collections of short essays or readings – one for each day of the year. These reflections shine a light on ideas or offer new ways of thinking about or looking at things. The best of them spark new perspectives to carry through your day.
One of the first Day Books that I dipped into years ago was a gift from a fellow ‘balance-challenged’ friend – a volume by Anne Wilson Schaef titled Meditations For Women Who Do Too Much. I’ve enjoyed many different Day Book types and topics over the years.
This year, I’m dipping into The Book of Awakening by Mark Nepo. The author’s struggle with cancer and his study of the human spirit have brought a laser like focus to his thinking about life. He’s an insightful observer and a skilled writer.
The sign of a good reflection is when its impact lingers beyond 24 hours and past the next reading in the book. It’s three weeks now since I read Mark’s January 20th treatise, and I keep coming back to his idea. (more…)
Caribbean Good Times
February 8, 2011
Well, we’re back after a 10 day get away from frosty Saskatchewan to the toasty Caribbean. Quite the shift to leave Florida at plus 27C and arrive back in Saskatoon at minus 23C.
My top five vacation experiences rank up like this:
1. Time away with my sweetheart.
2. Feeling the warm tropical air and watching the coconut palms swaying in the cool ocean breezes.
3. Snorkeling off Grand Turk where the vibrant sea life just off shore shares the drama with a sea wall that reaches down some 7000 feet. On your right sponges, coral and schools of colorful fish. On your left, nothing but the pure azure blue of the deep blue sea. Spectacular!
4. Painting beach and tropical scenes – getting to use the most beautiful blue pigments.
5. Sailing on a catamaran, sipping a rum and coke, bopping along to the reggae music, watching the sun paint the sky as it drops into the sea.
Ah, sweet memories! And now, back to work!
PS – For a peak at a few more paintings from the adventure, see the Colors Of The Caribbean Album on my facebook page.
PAUSE – 11.04 – Trust The Process
January 25, 2011
REFLECTION: This year, 2011, marks my 25th year in business. To celebrate the occasion, I’ve committed myself to writing and publishing my fifth book. ‘Press Pause…Think Again’ is scheduled for release early this fall. It’s going to be similar in style to its older sister, ‘Press Pause…Press On’ – both of them compilations of the most popular Pause messages.
It’s been nine months since I took my first tentative steps on this project. You’d think I might have given birth by now! However, pulling the material together has been an arduous, circuitous, on again, off again process – even though I’ve been down this path before.
Have you noticed that some projects are like that? Slippery? Tough to get a grip? Expanding in possibility one moment, and shifting direction the next? It wasn’t until last week that the organizing structure for the material finally came into focus. And it wasn’t for lack of effort on my part.
Let me recap, so you’ll know what I mean. Last spring, I reviewed the Pause messages from the last six years – some 300 in total. I earmarked those with potential for another book and ended up with 121 of them. Since I only needed 64 for another volume, my first thought was, “Heh – that’s enough for two books!” And so, overnight, the project doubled in size. (more…)
PAUSE – 11.03 – Keeping It Simple
January 18, 2011
REFLECTION: Broker world peace. Jump-start the economy. Cure cancer. Eliminate poverty. Save the planet.
The range of global concerns seems endless. Even our more modest individual goals and ambitions can end up supersized to the max. As inspiring and enervating as big hairy audacious goals can be, they also carry significant weight. And, shouldering the weight of the world can feel overwhelming, crippling and exhausting.
That’s why a FaceBook post this week by my Halifax friend and speaker colleague, Peter Davison, struck me so positively.
Peter wrote: Go forth, do good, return home, stay blessed. Repeat as necessary.
It’s an approach to daily life and a plan of action that’s blazingly simple and eminently doable. (more…)
PAUSE -11.02- A Slice Of Humble Pie
January 11, 2011
REFLECTION:
Last fall, I gifted my grandson with a subscription to a popular children’s magazine. I received, in return, a postcard to send the little guy indicating that the magazines would soon be on their way. I mailed him the postcard and also told him what to expect.
When I checked repeatedly with his Mom through the late fall and early winter about whether the magazines had started arriving, the answer was always no. In fact, they never even received the postcard announcement of the gift itself.
So, now, three months later, I finally decided it was time to call the magazine offices and demand an explanation. Irritated would be a pretty accurate description of my state of mind. I grew even more irritated by the time I held through the voice mail queue to lodge my complaint with James, a real live agent. bI laid out my problem fact by fact – in a tone that may have held just the slightest of edges.
On looking up my subscription account number, James immediately explained the situation. Turns out I had provided the right street address, but the wrong postal code, so the magazines had bounced back as undeliverable. The third time this happened, the distributor investigated, discovered the error, corrected the postal code, and had already graciously extended the subscription by the missing three months. The first magazine of the new year was already on its way to the corrected destination.
I thanked James for handling the situation so well, and apologized for my error. All set to point the finger of blame, I had no one to aim it at but myself.
ACTION:
I know I’m not the only person out there prone to jumping to conclusions. You may have experienced ‘a leap of sanctimony’ a time or two yourself. Self righteous indignation raises its ugly head in small ways and large ways both in the workplace and on the homefront. And, it’s such a colossal waste of energy with a strong likelihood of collateral damage.
Here are my reminder ‘Note To Self’ rules for tackling life’s sticky altercations:
* Speak up sooner rather than later when something goes awry.
* Don’t automatically ascribe incompetence on the part of others.
* Never assume that an error is entirely someone else’s fault.
* Explore what part I may have played in causing the problem.
* Be prepared to take or share responsibility for making things right.
P.S. In case it’s been a while, and you might have forgotten, I can tell you that humble pie has a unique flavor all its own!
________________________
QUOTES OF THE WEEK:
The greatest day in your life and mine is when we take total responsibility for our attitudes. That’s the day we truly grow up.” – John C. Maxwell
I would rather the man who presents something for my consideration subject me to a zephyr of truth and a gentle breeze of responsibility rather than blow me down with a curtain of hot wind.” – Grover Cleveland
_________________________
READERS WRITE:
In response to last week’s message, What’s Your Intention, Pause reader JG writes: This message is so fortuitous. I was just discussing choosing a word for the year with a friend. I realized I had already chosen mine while writing in my journal at year’s end. My word is LIGHT. To me it means to let the light in, spirituality, physically and emotionally; to follow my light; to share my light with the world; and to lighten up and enjoy the ride, to see the lighter side of things. I put this in motion by easing myself back into things on my first day back at work in a fairly stressed environment. I took the first half hour to read and lighten my expectations. I invited staff out for coffee first thing in the morning to lighten up the start to the work week. I lightened up our regularly scheduled meetings. And, on a personal note, I am lightening up on what I eat for supper (more salads please) and will hopefully lighten up the reading on the scale after my Christmas indulgences.
PS 2 – If you’ve been pondering your word for the year, I can tell you that these are some of the words that Pause readers tell me they have chosen to guide their direction for 2011: Thankfulness, Focus, Change, Reinforcement, Adventure, Reflection, Patience, Connection, and Gratitude
REFLECTION: Last fall, I gifted my grandson with a subscription to a popular children’s magazine. I received, in return, a postcard to send the little guy indicating that the magazines would soon be on their way. I mailed him the postcard and also told him what to expect.
When I checked repeatedly with his Mom through the late fall and early winter about whether the magazines had started arriving, the answer was always no. In fact, they never even received the postcard announcement of the gift itself.
So, now, three months later, I finally decided it was time to call the magazine offices and demand an explanation. Irritated would be a pretty accurate description of my state of mind. I grew even more irritated by the time I held through the voice mail queue to eventually lodge my complaint with James, a real live agent. I laid out my problem fact by fact – in a tone that may have held just the slightest of edges.
On looking up my subscription account number, James immediately explained the situation. (more…)
‘Box Of Crayons’ Offers Words Of Inspiration For 2011
January 5, 2011
Michael Bungay Stanier, author of More Great Work, and founder of ‘Box of Crayons’ offers this cool 48 second video with words of inspiration for 2011. Great words – great ideas – great work.
PAUSE -11.01- What’s Your Intention?
January 4, 2011
REFLECTION: A fresh new year. A blank slate of days stretching forward. How best to use your time and your energy?
January, for many, is a time of resolve. We create highly ambitious, jam-packed action lists of goals. In the end, we lose our focus or beat ourselves up as our super-human promises fall by the wayside.
The way I think about this practice has shifted over time. I have come to understand that HOW WE ARE in this world (our mindset – our character) is every bit as important as WHAT WE DO. And so, in recent years I’ve chosen to set one strong intention for being and not to create an exhaustive laundry list of resolutions for doing. Sure, I still make plans and set goals, but HOW I approach the demands of each day gets top billing. (more…)
REFLECTION: More than one study has confirmed that backlogs are an everyday fact of life in today’s overcommitted workplaces – not to mention on the home and community fronts. Despite the fact that we have an inordinate number of irons in the fire at any one time, that doesn’t seem to prevent us from adding more.
REFLECTION: Last week marked a significant change in my extended family, as my parents moved from their home on the farm into a brand new residence in Saskatoon. My Dad was born in that farmhouse 85 years ago. He lived and worked there for most of his life. My Mom joined him on the farm when they married 60 years ago.
REFLECTION: An aversion to stillness is a growing phenomenon in our plugged in world.
REFLECTION: Over the years, I’ve grown to enjoy the ‘one a day’ practice. I’m not talking about an apple a day keeping the doctor away, or a one-a-day vitamin to keep the body ticking along. I’m referring to what are often called Day Books. They’re collections of short essays or readings – one for each day of the year. These reflections shine a light on ideas or offer new ways of thinking about or looking at things. The best of them spark new perspectives to carry through your day.
Well, we’re back after a 10 day get away from frosty Saskatchewan to the toasty Caribbean. Quite the shift to leave Florida at plus 27C and arrive back in Saskatoon at minus 23C.
REFLECTION: This year, 2011, marks my 25th year in business. To celebrate the occasion, I’ve committed myself to writing and publishing my fifth book. ‘Press Pause…Think Again’ is scheduled for release early this fall. It’s going to be similar in style to its older sister, ‘Press Pause…Press On’ – both of them compilations of the most popular Pause messages.
REFLECTION: Broker world peace. Jump-start the economy. Cure cancer. Eliminate poverty. Save the planet.
REFLECTION: Last fall, I gifted my grandson with a subscription to a popular children’s magazine. I received, in return, a postcard to send the little guy indicating that the magazines would soon be on their way. I mailed him the postcard and also told him what to expect.
REFLECTION: A fresh new year. A blank slate of days stretching forward. How best to use your time and your energy?