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REFLECTION & ACTION: I have an irksome habit (and I have it in spades)-stuffing too much in! One more email. One more stop on the way. One more point in the presentation.

The motivation is good: squeeze maximum value out of each moment. However, the result is bad: time pressure and frustration, for me and for others.

Being more judicious about biting off more than we can comfortably chew is good for our health. Becoming more thoughtful and reasonable in all areas of life also brings positive changes to our mental health and our relationships.

A speaker colleague edits his presentations by keeping his audience and this question in mind: “What could they live without?” This question can be applied far and wide. Whether it’s our work, errands, or communications, we can ask ourselves, “What could we (or they) live without?”

With the enormous proliferation of email, think twice before sending a message into circulation. Will it add value? Will anyone read it? Will the other person’s world be better with this communication? Sometimes less is more. (more…)

REFLECTION & ACTION: Will you? Would you? Can you? Could you? On those short questions hang the hooks of overcommitment. Will you take on this project? Would you look after the kids for the weekend? Could you chair this committee?

The trap lies in believing there’s only a yes or no answer to each question.

Say “yes” and when you realize you don’t have time for the task or that it’s not a fit with your interests or priorities, you reward yourself with resentment. Say “no” and when you suffer second thoughts about the wisdom of your decision or its possible effect on your relationships or future, you reward yourself with guilt.

People often overlook the possibility of middle ground. (more…)

This dracaena spike and climbing little-leaf vine are a living example of taking your support where you can find it.

These two funghis – or should that be ‘fun guys’ – are clearly buddies. No moss growing under their feet! Heh, wait, yes there is.

No matter, they’re in absolutely no hurry to go anywhere – and seem to be content to take turns propping each other up.

REFLECTION & ACTION: As I listen to reports of life’s daily events, I witness indignation, wailing, and gnashing of teeth over supposed slights and imagined dastardly deeds. Yes, I even catch myself engaging in these flights of fancy from time to time.

Sometimes an illness is just an illness-not something caused by careless hygiene, dubious nutrition, or medical malpractice. Sometimes lost keys and bank cards are misplaced-not the work of a stealthy thief with sticky fingers. Sometimes an offhand remark is just plain thoughtless-not part of a diabolical plot to undermine our authority or self-esteem. Talk about blowing things out of proportion!

At the same time, much of the stress that leads someone to behave badly remains invisible to others. We aren’t always privy to each others’ burdens: an angry client, an ailing parent, a truant teen, a leaky roof, a dwindling bank account, a frightening medical report, an estranged friendship.

Let’s be more magnanimous with ourselves and each other. (more…)

Following our time in the Cotswolds and London, we spent a week in the south of France and another week in Paris. Here are a sampling of sketches from our journeys in France.

This window balcony was one of many on the buildings directly across the street (Rue Bernadine) from our room in the Abbatial Saint Germain in Paris. I love the flower pots on the window sills and balconies throughout the city.

It was fun to watch an older lady in her curlers and housecoat tending her geraniums each morning – watering with care, but pulling off dead leaves and blossoms and tossing them into the street below.

This is the entrance to Chez Pauline, the suite that was our main home for our week in Provence. This is one of many gites available for rent at Mas St Antoine in Rognonas near Avignon.

The gardens are beautiful and always changing – tended with care by the Kiwi owner-managers, Kerryn and Kerrin. You can see more comments about our stay and about the Mas itself on my Trip Advisor review.

This sketch was done on a sunny morning in Paris. We perched in the shade of one of Paris’ secret parks on Ile de la Cite:  Square de Vert-Galant.

This is looking down the Seine towards Pont Des Arts and the Institute of France. Houseboats are anchored along the edge, and the River Cruise Boats (les bateaux) ply their way up and down the waterway from morning through night.

In April of this year, I took a painting class from watercolor artist, Judi Whitton, in the Cotswolds area of England. The weather was outstanding – one of the warmest pre-Easter weeks on record for that part of the world. And the scenery is superb. Every time you turned around – an interesting vista, an engaging building, a painting in the making. Here are several of the images that I captured on my visit.

The first image is Brook House in South Cerney – the village where the class was held. This home was just next door to the town hall which was home base for us for the week. Most every house in the Cotswolds has a name – not just a number. What a cool way of honoring the geography and those who came before. Must drive pizza delivery guys crazy!

The second image is from the Cisely Hill neighborhood in Cirencester.

The vine crawling up and across the front of this home is a wisteria.

We were just a shade too early to see it in full bloom.

Although we got a taste of what that might be like as the wisteria on the house across on the sunny side of the street was spectacular.

Picture purple and lilac blossoms draped generously across the cotswold stone.

The third image was painted on a sunny Sunday afternoon in London.

This building is on the edge of Kensington Gardens in Hyde Park.

We had just strolled the open air art market on Bayswater Road, admiring the paintings on offer, chatting with the artists, and picking up a couple of sweet petite watercolor treasures to bring home with us.

A faithful Pause Blog reader commented yesterday that she hadn’t seen much of my painting in recent Pause Blog postings.

And I realized that, although I have often posted sketches to my Facebook Photo Albums, I really haven’t shared that much through the blog lately.

So, for those of you who are interested in what’s happening on the Pauseworks Art Front, I’m going to attempt to rectify that.

Today, I’m posting a couple of sketches from our recent lakeside get-away to Waskesiu.

Over the next few days, I’ll post a few sketches from our spring travels to England and France.

Hope you enjoy them all!

REFLECTION & ACTION: In the early years of my business, I worked many weekends and often delivered an all-day seminar followed by an evening presentation. As burnout loomed, I chose a policy of working just one weekend a month, speaking and training no more than three days a week, and presenting in only two out of three time slots on a given day (morning, afternoon, or evening).

My productivity and energy soared. Amazingly, so did my profits. Clearly, taking care of myself was also good for my business.

Community service is another area where overload shifts the experience from blessing to burden. How many community groups can you serve at a time and still feel enthused as you head out the door to another evening meeting?

If you’re frustrated en route, you’ll feel less than enthusiastic at the meeting itself. Rest assured, if you don’t want to be there and can’t wait to get away, you aren’t the ray of sunshine that will brighten the day for others. (more…)

REFLECTION & ACTION: Over the years, most of our family vacations have included an emotional meltdown by one member or another at some point during the trip. Our most “memorable” vacations have featured multiple meltdowns, triggered by lapses in communication or thwarted expectations.

One vacation meltdown occurred over something my traveling partner couldn’t control. Really, what are the chances he would consciously choose to have a killer cold coupled with zero enthusiasm on our only day on the beautiful Greek island of Mykonos?

Nevertheless, there I was-stuck in a snit-actively making a rough day worse. The speaker in me tried to talk it out. The writer in me grabbed my journal and scratched out my frustrations on paper. Neither approach tempered my bad humor.

It was only a change in my frame of reference that turned my mood around. (more…)

REFLECTION & ACTION: Ask people about their most satisfying experiences with time. You might be surprised by their answers. Yes, the pleasure of accomplishment-getting projects done and checking tasks off lists-ranks high. However, you’ll find that the experience of unstructured, wide-open chunks of time with no planned activities is right up there, too.

It’s refreshing to have an hour, an afternoon, or a day to putter and ramble-to go where the spirit moves you, not feeling pressured to be anywhere or do anything in particular. Think of this as white space on your calendar-a wide-open chunk of time with no special commitments or duties.

It’s a time when you could invite that new colleague for coffee and conversation or dip into the professional reading that’s been piling up in the corner of your office. You might lean over the fence and visit with the neighbors. You could play a round of Monopoly with the kids or snuggle up on the couch with your partner. You could curl up in a hammock with a good book. Or you could simply do nothing at all. (more…)