PAUSE -10.15- Settle Down – Settle In
June 3, 2010
REFLECTION:
St James Independent, a boys’ school in London, starts each day with a formalized Pause. All 300 of the students gather in assembly to sit in silence, calm down and settle in for the day ahead. Now this is something I’d pay to see: 300 young boys sitting still for ten minutes – no talking, no fidgeting!
That’s not the only point of pause in the St James school day. Each class begins and ends with 30 seconds of silence – a chance for students to clear their minds and prepare for what comes next.
The headmaster of the school positions the practice as one of creating an oasis for learning and as an antidote to our ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) way of being in the world – continuously plugged in and responding to outside stimulation.
ACTION:
What kind of practices have you already incorporated or could you start using more regularly to settle down and settle in for the everyday experiences of your life? It doesn’t have to be complicated.
* Sit down at your desk and sit back in your chair with eyes closed for a minute before diving in to your email, checking your to do list, or tackling the next task.
* Take a deep breath before answering the phone.
* Start a meeting with 30 seconds of silence. Give attendees a chance to shake off outside concerns and bring their attention to the room. Bodies may be in chairs, but minds may not be present.
Give these or other ideas a try and see what kind of presence and calm they bring to your day.
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QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“Quiet and stillness in our urban environments is a rare thing. Quiet and stillness in the human mind is even rarer.” – Ronski
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RESOURCE OF THE WEEK:
For more on the St James approach, and other thoughts on pausing, silence and stillness, check out this BBC article at: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/magazine/8714177.stm
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READERS WRITE:
In response to last week’s message, ‘Hold Lightly-Not Tightly’, Pause reader BT writes: I experience a similar pain when plans evaporate, as I am certainly one of those who creates expectations. The moment I realize that life’s events have led me away from plans, I feel disappointed, confused and angry at whatever I feel is responsible for the derailment.
I started telling myself “no plans – no disappointment”. But that just left me empty, as I lost the pleasure of the anticipation. I soon realized that, although I was not responsible for the change in events, I was responsible for the way I was feeling.
Life sometimes has a slightly different path planned for us; and we just have to realize we must steer in a slightly different direction. Hold Lightly – Not Tightly is now another tool I will use, along with always having a plan B in circumstances that hold a certain level of unpredictability. Thank you for adding to my life’s tool box.
REFLECTION: St James Independent, a boys’ school in London, starts each day with a formalized Pause. All 300 of the students gather in assembly to sit in silence, calm down and settle in for the day ahead. Now this is something I’d pay to see: 300 young boys sitting still for ten minutes – no talking, no fidgeting!
That’s not the only point of pause in the St James school day. Each class begins and ends with 30 seconds of silence – a chance for students to clear their minds and prepare for what comes next.
The headmaster of the school positions the practice as one of creating an oasis for learning and as an antidote to our ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) way of being in the world – continuously plugged in and responding to outside stimulation. (more…)
All Your Travel Necessities
May 31, 2010
Couldn’t resist sharing this photo of the merchandise on offer at a gas station convenience store between Toro and Madrid in northwestern Spain. There were of course the items you might expect to find: soft drinks, potato chips, candy, motor oil, washer fluid, etc. But also, right in the middle of the shop, was this stand of cured hams and salamis. Apparently, you never know when you might be hit by an urgent need for same – or be halfway to your destination and realize that you left your ham at home!
Women of Distinction Award
May 28, 2010
Spent a lovely evening May 27th in the company of a group of amazing women and their supporters. I was delighted to be named the recipient of the YWCA Women of Distinction Award in Leadership & Management.
It’s an honor to take a turn in the spotlight. And, the best thing is that when a light is focused on any one of us, we all shine just a little bit brighter in the reflected glow of everyone’s stellar accomplishments.
Congratulations to all the nominees and recipients.
PAUSE -10.14- Hold Lightly – Not Tightly
May 26, 2010
REFLECTION:
Well, folks, it’s been six weeks since I signed off for a Pause sabbatical in anticipation of the Great Spring Travel Adventure. You’ll recall I was headed for Europe to spend a week taking a painting class in the Cotswolds, followed by two weeks with my husband in London and Paris, and a final two weeks with a painting group touring Portugal, Spain and Morocco.
Those of you who follow my blog or Facebook page will already know things didn’t quite unfold according to plan. It seems the Icelandic Volcano had other ideas in mind for me. The thick layer of volcanic ash clogging the flightpaths over Europe shut down air travel on the very day we were to leave for London. We rebooked our flights for 5 days later only to be cancelled again with the prospect of yet another 5 day wait before we could snag another set of seats – IF the airports were open.
By then I had missed the painting class completely, all our time in the UK would have evaporated, and Dave and I would be left with one short week together in Paris. So, we opted to cancel our shared portion of the trip in hopes of something more substantial at a later time, and I rebooked to fly directly to join the painting group in Lisbon.
Frankly, I did not take the change well. We had set plans for this adventure months earlier. It had taken a major investment of energy to work out the details and coordinate the connections. I was highly invested in anticipation and excitement.
Sure, there were consolations. We were alive and well. We were physically comfortable at home, not jammed into the corner of some airport waiting room with thousands of others halfway around the world. We were able to recoup most of our deposits or arrange credits on trip arrangements. Still, I had a terrible time shaking the black cloud over MY head.
Friends and family extended comfort and suggested there would be great lessons to harvest from the experience. Frankly, the most I could muster at the time was a succinct and acerbic, “Life sucks! Move on!”
ACTION:
Looking back on the experience from this end, I find that I do have a better perspective on the whole situation. In the scheme of possible life events a cancelled, postponed, or rearranged vacation rates pretty low on the list of things that could go wrong – certainly nowhere near disaster status. Of course, I knew that at the time – in my mind – but it still felt horribly disappointing in my gut.
The core problem with my reaction centered on my expectations. I had built up a huge head of steam in anticipation of things unfolding according to plan. The more tightly I held to those original expectations, the more pain I experienced as those plans evaporated into thin air – or in this case smoke and ash.
If there’s anything I’ve learned that might be a helpful mantra for all of us in those times when life heads sideways, it’s the idea of ‘Holding Lightly – Not Tightly.’
PS – I had a chance to test this approach on our scheduled return from Madrid to Frankfurt to Ottawa to Saskatoon. Bad weather in Frankfurt delayed our flight out of Madrid. By the time we lifted off the runway in Spain, our two and a half hour connection window in Frankfurt had narrowed to 30 minutes. A number of my travelling companions were distraught.
In my mind, I found myself reviewing the possibilities. It could be the flight from Frankfurt to Ottawa is also delayed and we have more time than we realize. Could be the airline holds the Ottawa flight for the 14 of us who are making connections. Could be we miss the connection completely and have to rebook. Any one of those things is just as likely to happen as another – and no matter which one it is, all will be well. Hold lightly – not tightly.
In fact we did miss our connection in Frankfurt. Lufthansa rebooked us for the next morning through Calgary to Saskatoon and provided hotel, meals and ground transfer for everyone. And yes, all was indeed well.
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QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“When it hurts so bad, it’s because I am hanging on so tight.” – Pema Chodron
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RESOURCE OF THE WEEK:
I really found the ideas in this book by Pema Chodron helpful: “When Things Fall Apart – Heart Advice for Difficult Times”. If you find yourself hitting a rough patch or two, you might find Pema’s ideas speak to you, too.
Also, for any of you who are interested in catching a taste of my travels as they did unfold, you can check out the postings I made from Portugal, Spain and Morocco on my Pause Blog at: http://www.pauseworks.com/wp/ Just click on the Travel category, and you’ll find all the most recent postings at the top of the list. Enjoy.
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READERS WRITE:
In response to the most recent message on R & R (Remorse & Regret), Pause reader LE writes: ” I am currently battling the issue of having mired myself in doing too much on a project. My resentment, I have realized, is that no one has stepped forward to “rescue” me. I am taking a serious look at my
own culpability in all of this, stepping back where it makes sense, drawing my line, sticking to it (the hardest part)…and moving on. Thanks for your wisdom.”
REFLECTION: Well, folks, it’s been six weeks since I signed off for a Pause sabbatical in anticipation of the Great Spring Travel Adventure. You’ll recall I was headed for Europe to spend a week taking a painting class in the Cotswolds, followed by two weeks with my husband in London and Paris, and a final two weeks with a painting group touring Portugal, Spain and Morocco.
Those of you who follow my blog or Facebook page will already know things didn’t quite unfold according to plan. It seems the Icelandic Volcano had other ideas in mind for me. The thick layer of volcanic ash clogging the flightpaths over Europe shut down air travel on the very day we were to leave for London. We rebooked our flights for 5 days later only to be cancelled again with the prospect of yet another 5 day wait before we could snag another set of seats – IF the airports were open.
By then I had missed the painting class completely, all our time in the UK would have evaporated, and Dave and I would be left with one short week together in Paris. So, we opted to cancel our shared portion of the trip in hopes of something more substantial at a later time, and I rebooked to fly directly to join the painting group in Lisbon.
Frankly, I did not take the change well. (more…)
Notes From Marrakech
May 24, 2010
I can’t really say that I have ever longed to visit Marrakech. But when I learned it was to be part of our painting expedition, I looked forward to a chance to capture some of the colors of life in Morocco.
Unfortunately, shortly after our arrival, I ended up sick and spent the first day and a half confined to quarters. Fortunately, quarters – in this case, Riad Catalina – offered lots of opportunities to dip into my colors. It was as much fun as someone who is under the weather has a right to expect. Thought you might enjoy a sketch or two that came out of my confinement.
Although I missed out on a first hand experience of the Fnaa (complete with snakes, watersellers, and henna artists), I did recouperate enough to take a ride in a calleche to visit the Majorelle Gardens and also to spend an afternoon shopping the souks for souvenirs.
Now that I’m back in Canada again, here are a few notes from my Moroccan experience:
* Marrakech is a city of contrasts – crazy, chaotic street action offset by cool and refreshing oases (riad courtyards, Majorelle Gardens, rooftop terraces high above the din)
* Colorful pigments, yarns, spices – all on offer. Spices with odors so strong, a few grams in your suitcase is enough to scent your entire traveling wardrobe.
* Fabulous tastes. Picture twelve different cold plates of salad, each one featuring a veggie individually spiced and flavored, each plate more interesting, colorful, and delicious than the last.
* Call to prayer five times a day – broadcast from the mosque to the neighborhood at large. I’m sure I heard every word of the 4:30 am call on our last morning in Marrakech.
* The shopkeepers’ determination and glee in bartering for their goods. After a satisfying exchange and subsequent agreement, a shake of hands and more relaxed and congenial conversations.
*In the last deal of my visit, I purchased 6 glass and silver bottles to hold the pigments I’d bought the day before. When the shopkeeper discovered he only had 5 on hand, he told me to stay right there, he’d be right back. Then he rushed out of the shop, hopped on his motorbike and disappeared into the souks. leaving me solo in his shop. Five minutes later he’s back with the final item. Whether it was retrieved from a storehouse, borrowed or bought from a buddy, I do not know. I do know he showed a phenomenal level of trust you don’t find here in North America!
Noted In Spain
May 17, 2010
We made two stops in Spain – Toro and Madrid. Toro is an older village in north western part of the country. We stayed in the old town at the Juan II with great views of the Rio Douro valley and the Collegiata. It was dang cold there – unusually so, apparently. Experienced lots of cloud, rain, fog and a bit of hail – as well as snow in the mountains on the way from Toro to Madrid.
Still I did learn that it is possible to paint in the cold – just bundle yourself up in a blanket on the balcony and be prepared to zip back indoors when it starts to spit.
Warmer weather in Madrid. Big celebration while we were there. The birthday of the city’s patron saint as well as the 100th anniversary of the Grand Via – one of Madrid’s main boulevards. First time I’ve seen a street paved in royal blue carpet for blocks and blocks. A very festive mood.
As for what I noted in Madrid:
– fashionable women – great boots and leather jackets
– many women and children in national costume in honor of the holiday
– lots of folks visiting in wine bars – standing while chatting and enjoying the tapis
– sculptures and decorative bits on the tops of building after building – an unbelievable degree of decoration
– beautiful ironwork balconies, light fixtures
– dark arts at the Prado – Goya, El Greco, Velasquez – those fellows had some very dark days indeed
And now off to sample the offerings in Marrakech, Morocco.
Expect that my burnt sienna paint will get a pretty good workout on those terra cotta buildings.
Notes From Pinhao
May 14, 2010
If you are looking for a fabulous place to stay in Portugal, I highly recommend Casa do Visconde de Chanceleiros near Pinhao up the Duoro River Valley. Ursula, Adeladie and the staff will make you feel very at home.
Beautiful suites and cottages – with fabulous gardens tended with love and attention. Roses, roses, everywhere. Molly, the English bulldog, to entertain.
Beautiful place from which to enjoy the views of the vineyards spreading out across the hills.
Take a ride on a rubella (the ancient boats used to transport the port wine down the river for export). Sip a few glasses of port wine – everywhere you go or on your visits to the neighboring qintas (wineries).
Noted In Portugal
May 14, 2010
Terra cotta roofs and white washed buildings.
Vineyards and olive groves.
Port wine and fresh seafood. Painted tiles in blues and yellows.
Cork trees biding their time for harvest.
Tasty breads, dried meats and olives.
Last year’s huge overripe oranges hanging on the same trees on which new orange blossoms perfume the air and set the fruit for the season ahead.
The photo above from Porto on the Douro River. The painting below sketched on location on the same riverbank.
Sao Martinho do Porto
May 9, 2010
A few glimpses of scenes from Sao Martinho north up the coast from Lisbon.
Many boats in the bay. Lovely houses up the hills.
Gotta love a house on the hill!
Lisbon Highlights
May 7, 2010
Gotta love these pastries – flaky bottom and custard filling.
Ate this one still warm from the oven. Mmmmm good!
Santa Domingo soars in downtown Lisbon. Would you look this good if you’d survived earthquakes in 1500s and 1700s and a fire in 1959?
