health

Reflection: When I speak and write about granting our selves and each other permission to pause, many people grasp the idea in quick order. They can see that there’s a strong case for renewal and re-energizing in the face of overwhelming demands. It makes sense on an intellectual level.

But, that message doesn’t always make it from the brain to the gut – where so many of our decisions and choices are actually made. As a result, the idea literally does not sit well with us.

Now, as you know, it is possible to force yourself to sit down for a moment to catch your breath and take a break. But how often does that rest take the form of a tentative perch on the edge of your seat, burdens still at hand, muscles tensed to lift off again at a moment’s notice, brain on high alert?

That’s not much of a break especially when compared to option B. You drop into a chair and drop into the moment. You let your body be surrounded and supported, relax your muscles, set your burdens aside, and tell your brain to take a hike.

It’s the same 30-60-90 seconds, but it’s a significantly difference experience.

Action: The next time you sense you need to step back for a few moments, pay close attention to your approach. (more…)

Reflection: Our pursuit of success has both an upside and a downside – a bright side and a dark side.

The very same impulses that drive us to success (a commitment to showing up, the ambition to get ahead, and a desire to make a difference) are the very same impulses that can drive us to excess (taking on too many things at once, working ourselves to exhaustion, and driving ourselves and those around us crazy in the process).

In our pursuit of success and significance, it’s far too easy to lose our focus and to lose our way – to end up feel overwhelmed and overloaded.

Trying to handle the situation with traditional time management tools only makes a small dint in this experience. Goal setting, prioritizing, delegation, and techno efficiency will only take us so far.

If we want to be sustainably productive, we need to concern ourselves with other equally important elements of productivity:

• Maintaining perspective
• Developing presence
• Tapping into peace of mind

Action: Pay close attention to perspective, presence and peace of mind as you make your way through today:

• Remember why the things you are working on matter.
• Take satisfaction as you move projects forward – even if they aren’t yet complete.
• Be present to the people who share your world and your work.
• Tune in your body and your thoughts; and answer the call when they signal what you need.
• Tap into that invisible ‘river of peace’ that flows at your feet every moment of every day.

Quote Of The Week: Could we stop measuring our days by degree of productivity and start experiencing them by degree of presence? – Yours Truly

Our entire society can be changed by one person’s peaceful presence. – Thich Nhat Hanh

Resource Of The Week: You might find this article by Lori Deschene of interest: Productivity & Happiness – Why Are We So Busy?

Readers Write: In response to last week’s message, What Can You Learn From A Toddler On Overload, Pause reader JO writes:  “I am not sure who said this or coined it but if I have an important meeting or event it’s important to HALT and do an internal check. Am I Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired (HALT)? If so I take care of it prior to that important event or meeting!”

I did a little sleuthing on attribution, JO, and it seems this acronym is most strongly associated with treatment programs for chemical dependency. The thought here is that when we are in weakened states (as in HALT) we are more likely to make poor choices. When you recognize and take care of those needs, you improve the likelihood of making more thoughtful, healthy and sustainable choices.

Reflection: We’ve become far too accustomed to stuffing our days from end to end with task after task, trying to accomplish as much as possible as quickly as possible.

We latch on to shortcuts as if they might lead us to the holy grail of happiness. We grab fast food and we leave quick notes. We ask quick questions. We share quick hugs, and we send quick texts.

We literally cut ourselves and each other to the quick as we speed off to…what? What, exactly, are we trying to make of our lives? Where are we headed at such a breakneck pace? And what do we end up experiencing along the way?

Consider for just a moment, what might happen if every once in a while you: (more…)

Reflection: Here it is the beginning of September, and I see Summer waving goodbye in the rearview mirror. I’m surprised at what seems like an early departure.

Despite the luxury of time that is July and August, there are so many things I didn’t accomplish. I didn’t go golfing or biking. In fact, the clubs and the bike are still hanging on the wall in the garage. I didn’t attend any events at Saskatoon’s Jazz Festival, Children’s Festival or the Fringe. I didn’t get the carpets cleaned or the fence replaced. And, I didn’t make my way through even half the books I’d hope to read.

I did, however, enjoy my morning walks along the river and lunches on the back deck. I shared some great visits with friends and family, and spent time with family who came here from away. I was tickled to spend several fun filled days with my seven-year-old grandson, Ethan. I sketched and painted and tended the garden.

I helped my Dad total up the grain he’d grown over a lifetime of farming and translated the bushels of wheat, durum and barley into loaves of bread, bowls of spaghetti and bottles of beer. (Amazing totals those!) I worked on the design for a new business offering and arranged for the second printing of my latest book.

Still, in the richness and muchness of life, it’s easy to feel like I haven’t done or been or given … enough. Maybe you feel that way, too! (more…)

Reflection & Action: I caught a ride on a beautiful fall day with a cab driver who could easily have taken the grand prize for the world’s darkest outlook on life. In response to my comments on the freshness of the morning, the beauty of the autumn leaves, and the glassy calm of Wascana Lake, he responded in turn, “Frost last night – gonna make the harvest tough! Just reminds me winter’s coming! It’s never like that when I go fishing!”

I’m sure if he won a hundred thousand dollars in the lottery, he wouldn’t waste a minute celebrating. He would launch right into a litany of complaints about the uselessness of a prize that small!

Our mindset has a lot to do with our experience of the day.  It is possible to shift from pure pessimism to a more optimistic response to life. It’s a matter of attention. What do you notice? What do you hang on to? How do you start your conversations with yourself and others?

As day’s end nears, and you shut down your computer, pull on your coat, or jump in the car to head home, ask yourself this simple question: “What went well today?”

Ask the same question of colleagues as you close up shop, and of family members as you gather for the evening. Yes, you’ll eventually get to the complaints, but at least the good news of the day will hold center stage and pride of place. That’s all it takes to start the shift of focus. (more…)

Editor’s Note: During the months of July and August, your weekly Pause Blog posts will feature the ‘Best of Pause’. These are readers’ favorite messages from the earlier years of the Pause e-zine. Featuring these Pause Gems will give me a bit of a breather, and also introduce our newer subscribers to some of those early editions.

Whether you are a long time subscriber, or new to our list, I sincerely hope you enjoy these messages. Come September, your Pause messages will once again feature all new info and resources.

PS – The Summer Reading Bookshelf shares the titles of some of the books I’ll be dipping into over the next couple of months.

Reflection & Action: From time to time, I have worked with colleagues who sparred for brownie points by quizzing each other about issues like these: How late did your meeting run last night? How many weekends will you be on the road? How many holidays are you carrying over? How many miles have you clocked on the company car? What’s the points total on your frequent flyer plan? How many emails stacked up while you were on vacation?

More recently, I listened to a panel of work-life balance experts talk about their successes and failures in balancing their own busy lives. They admitted they were challenged to live up to the goals they set for themselves. That’s true for all of us. Still, something in the tone of their responses seemed to suggest that it was okay for their lives to be out of whack because they were doing such important work.

It took me back to other conversations where professional or personal success were measured in terms of load, distance, sacrifice, and ‘face time’. The scale paid little attention to results and none at all to balance.

Eavesdrop on the tone of your own conversations with friends and colleagues when you talk about work-life balance. (more…)

Reflection: It can be tempting (especially if you like things neat and tidy) to compartmentalize life, assigning each role its own box and time slot. Work is work. Vacation is vacation. Play is…well, hard to come by.

In today’s world, it’s next to impossible to contain life this way. It’s far more likely that we will be able to make time for more of the things we care about if we allow them to rub shoulders with each other – overlapping in the natural messiness and flow of life.

On this morning’s walk (which is, by the way, when I get some of my best ideas for Pause messages) I was thinking back to some of the combos that have danced their way through my life.

When our girls played outdoor soccer, I used to alternate visiting in my lawn chair on the sidelines with walking around the perimeter of the field while the game played on. Exercising, socializing, and supporting my daughters in one fell swoop.

For several summers, the girls took swimming lessons at an outdoor pool. While they swam, I caught up on my business reading while catching a few rays myself.

Over the years, I’ve invited my mom and my daughters to accompany me on business road trips. One on one chat time is precious; and it sure beats hearing the same tired radio newscast over and over again. Now that I have a grandson in Calgary, I try to route travel to or from my Alberta speaking engagements through that city to catch time with the little guy.

These days, my paints and sketchbook travel with me. Sketching makes time on the road more enjoyable and flight delays more bearable. Even though life may be busy with work, I still have time for art.

Action: There are times to turn off the biz world, and be only with family. There are times to be single mindedly focused on business while letting other roles cool their hoofies on the sidelines. And, there are times to encourage the bits and pieces of our lives to mix and mingle.

Look for ways to create a few more renewal combos in your world. In the face of the daily grind: add experiences that lift your spirits, mix in activities that renew your energy, and take actions that strengthen your relationships.

(more…)

Reflection: I’ve been thinking recently that I wouldn’t mind being listless for a while. I don’t mean in the traditional sense of the word: lethargic, apathetic, or weary. Nor do I mean without a list of things to do – although that would be welcome on occasion.

What I’m actually referring to is the proliferation of lists that circulate on social media and grace the covers of books and magazines everywhere. Here are a few recent examples:

• 14 Things You Should Do On Your Lunch Break Every Day
• 17 Things Extremely Happy People Say Every Day
• 18 Things Highly Creative People Do Differently
• 22 Quick Habits to Add To Your Daily Morning Routine
• 30 Things To Start Doing For Yourself – or its sister list: 30 Things To Stop Doing To Yourself

Add ‘em up. I’m exhausted just thinking about it.

I know these lists are published with the best of intentions – mostly to energize or inspire. And I grant you there is valuable advice in many of them. Heck, I’ve even created a few of these types of lists myself.

But here’s my challenge. When I spend too much time paying attention to these lists, I find myself in Tower of Pisa mode – tilted and off balance. I feel less effective and more inadequate because I’m not doing more or behaving differently.

You, too, might find yourself listing just a tad under the weight of what the advice aggregators believe we could or should be doing.

Action: With all these voices whispering instructions in your ear and putting ideas in your head, it’s hard to hear the one still quite voice that counts the most. That would be your own. (more…)

Reflection: What joy it can be to find yourself ‘in the flow’. You’re supremely focused on the task at hand – caught up in concentration and creativity.

Yet, like most of life’s experiences, flow has its shadow side, too.

It’s possible to become so intent on the task at hand that we lose perspective or ignore our body’s calls for attention.

In a painting class I took from acclaimed watercolor artist, Charles Reid, we often worked with a live model. Charles insisted that the model break from the pose every 30 minutes.

Occasionally the model would protest saying he was just fine with sitting longer. Charles always responded, “Well, we’re not.”

Then he’d rise from the stool in front of his easel, stroll around, and step outside for a few minutes to either get some fresh air or smoke his pipe. We all followed his lead – well except for lighting up a pipe!

Newfoundland artist, Keli-Ann Pye-Beshara, takes a similar approach. I’ve watched her live-stream painting demonstrations and seen her set a timer for 30 minutes.

When it rings, she puts down the brush, stands up, and steps away from the work to stretch her neck, her hands and her back. She invites viewers to do the same.

Action: There is a physical release and renewal that comes with these breaks in the flow. (more…)

Reflection: Back in January, a local TV station asked me to share a few ideas to help people cope with Blue Monday. That’s the Monday of the last full week in January – what is referred to by many as the most depressing day of the year.

While the Blue Monday pedigree is questionable, everyone has blue days and they don’t limit themselves to the month of January!

There’s no need to hold in reserve the strategies you can use to perk up your life when you’re feeling low.

Action: Here are five actions to perk up your life any time you need a boost: (more…)