appreciation

Reflection: Traditionalists, Boomers, Gen X, Gen Y, and Millenials are all labels assigned to groups of people of a certain age.

In a world where we look for easy answers and ready-made explanations, this pigeonholing has gained a lot of traction. However, oversimplifying can build barriers instead of connections.

Each group is portrayed as having predictable motivations, values and behaviours. Those characterizations are not always accurate. For each generalization, most of us could cite an exception to the rule.

In truth, many of us share common values and aspirations despite the fact that we were born and raised in different times.

For these reasons, I was intrigued to read a recent article by Gina Pell, who notes that there are individuals of every age who live in the present, connect to world developments, and relate to others of varied ages. They stay curious and relevant, keep learning and growing, and consistently try new things.

Her tag for these folks? (more…)

My Thoughts:

 I wrote this message on November 14 in honor of ‘Loosen Up, Lighten Up Day’. (Thanks to my perennially good humored friend, Michael Kerr, for bringing these special days to our attention.)

A number of recent events (your list here…) might have prompted you to do just the opposite – to tighten up, flip out, or tilt to the dark side.

What if we could find a few ways to loosen our grip and lighten our mood? Well, here’s a handful of starter actions to lead you down that road: (more…)

Reflection: If you’ve been following some of the work I’ve shared over the last year with respect to Spark & Malaise, you’ll recall me mentioning Bonnie Ware’s findings on the regrets people express near the ends of their lives.

In her research, the number one regret Ware heard repeatedly was that ‘people wished they’d had the courage to live a life true to themselves instead of the lives that others expected of them.’

That top finding is echoed in more recent research by Kathy Caprino.

In Caprino’s survey of those at an earlier stage in their lives (middle age and mid-career), she found the following top five regrets: (more…)

My Thoughts:

A friend, and fellow artist, Sharon Bellknap recently shared the Encinatas Sunrise photo you see featured here.

The image is a stunner. Sharon tells me those colors became more and more beautiful, and then… they were gone.

That very same day, here in Saskatoon, the morning sun lit up our evergreen, bathing them in gold. By the time I returned with my camera…the magic was gone.

Moments like this are often short lived. They’re here…and then they’re gone. The real question is: Where are we?

Sharon tells me that on this particular morning she was out exercising her capacity to soak up precious moments. I love that phrase and that idea.

Your Thoughts:

How might our lives be enriched if you and I practiced our capacity to soak up more precious moments every day? (more…)

Reflection: As much as we might like to think that our success is entirely our own doing, the truth suggests otherwise.

None of us goes it completely alone. There are always others who have opened doors or offered opportunities and support along the way.

I recently had an opportunity to speak to Payroll Professionals in Atlantic Canada about cultivating connections and networking effectively.

In my message, I suggested we focus less on ‘getting the most from our networks’ and focus more on ‘giving the most to our networks’.

In my experience, when we focus on supporting others, good things also tend to flow in our direction.

Action: Here are five ways to actively support those in your circles of connection. Try one today. (more…)

Reflection: We had the great joy of closing out the summer by hosting our 9 year old grandson for a couple of days at Waskesiu Lake.

The weather on the front end was less than ideal. Too cold to swim. To rough to take out a canoe, a paddleboat or a kayak. No matter.

It was perfect for beach combing – given all the flotsam and jetsam that the gale force winds tossed up on shore.

And, as Ethan walked along the beach, eyes glued to the sand, each of his discoveries was accompanied by an expression of delight.

Snail shells. Fish hooks. Odd rocks. Dead minnows.

“Heh, look over here! How cool is this? Is that awesome or what?”

And, of course, each find had to be picked up and closely examined before being added to the collection of treasures to be hauled back to the cabin. Two dead minnows included!

Unfavorable conditions – in this case, the weather – were NOT going to put a damper on this young fellow’s spirits, or interfere with his ability to find delight at every turn. (more…)

Reflection & Action: Attention over-extended, over-achievers.

Yeah, you! If you’re the one with the endless list of things to do. The one who always volunteers for that last minute job, chairs the committees, works the extra shifts, hauls the kids, hosts the socials, and generally goes the extra mile!

Yeah, you! If you’re the one who puts yourself at the bottom of those lists in invisible ink. The one who makes sure everybody else leaves on time, remembers their vitamins, books their vacations, and gets those pats on the back.

Might you be feeling just a tad overwhelmed by all you’ve undertaken or a tad under-valued from being taken for granted?

Well, stop right there! It’s time for a glance in the mirror and a heart to heart chat!

Whether you realize it or not, you matter! And not just because of all you do in support of those around you. You matter simply because you are who you are and you’re here. And, by the way, in case you missed the memo – you are enough!

Whether you hear it from others or not – you do make a difference in the lives of those around you. Just don’t be making that contribution from a feeling of lack, an overactive sense of duty, nor at the expense of your own wellbeing! Take care of you, too! Take time to be with you, too.

What to do with this reminder? (more…)

Reflection & Action: There’s nothing like a good question to draw attention to what makes life worthwhile. And, for the record, that question is NOT: “So, are you busy?”

Far too many conversations in our stressed out, revved up world start just that way. We connect with a colleague at work, bump into an old friend at the grocery store, or meet a neighbor on the street. Before we even think about it, we’re automatically asking, “So, are you busy?”

It’s a question that usually generates a lengthy recounting of activities done and undone. Recounting the proverbial to do list seems to be a common way to establish our value and justify our existence on the planet.

Oddly enough, when you ask people to consider what really matters in life, the things that show up most frequently tend not to be the things that populate their to do lists.

What’s most meaningful and energizing relates more to the big picture issues: relationships and adventures, or a deep sense of connectedness and purpose.

If that is where more meaning lives, why not change the focus of our conversations? Why not start asking each other these questions instead: (more…)

Reflection & Action:  It was bright and early Sunday morning, and our then four year old grandson was on the other end of the phone – brimming with enthusiasm and bubbling over with news.

“Guess what I’m having for breakfast? Toast with jam and TWO slices of cheese. Orange and white cheese – marble cheese. Marble, that’s funny! And, Mommy made me a Smoothie, too. It is SO good. And, you know what she bought me yesterday at the grocery store? Cheese strings. THOSE are my favorite. And, I’m watching the Cat In The Hat video. And he’s bouncing on the bed. I like to do that, too. AND, I get to go swimming today! I am having a VERY Lucky Day!”

That nonstop monologue turned MY groggy morning into a very Lucky Day. How can you NOT smile in the face of that kind of exuberance?

Enthusiasm is infectious. And if you have to come down with something, enthusiasm beats other viruses, hands down!

There’s no doubt, as adults, we have serious things to deal with. Yet, there are times when I know I complicate my life more than is necessary. Maybe you do, too. (more…)

My Thoughts:

As I grow older, I seem to become less concerned about knowing how things will end before I commit to a start.

Maybe I’m more confident in my ability to handle whatever comes up.

Or maybe I’ve realized that imagining I control the outcomes is mostly an illusion anyway.

I do know that I’ve been around the block enough times to realize that the sheer act of beginning something new opens doors and invites possibilities that are never apparent when you’re hunkered down on the sidelines wondering, ‘Should I…?’

Your Thoughts:

Are you toying with trying something new? Why not find a low risk way to stand up, step out, and test the waters?

Let yourself be surprised and amazed. And, let me know how it goes!

News Notes:

It’s just over a year since I stood up and stepped out to explore the challenges of mid life malaise. Some of you will remember responding to a survey on that topic in early 2015.

Since then, I’ve used the results of that research to craft a variety of programs on Rekindling Spark – Navigating Mid Life Malaise. Over the last six months, I’ve designed and delivered a Ted Talk, a conference keynote, a follow up breakout session, and a half day seminar.

There’s nothing like stepping out and testing new material to see if it makes a contribution and a difference. And, this most certainly does. (more…)