41 years ago today (April 13, 1970), Jack Swigert, astronaut on the infamous Apollo 13 mission delivered five memorable words, “Houston, we’ve got a problem!”, after an oxygen tank burst on their way to the Moon. In fact, Swigert’s actual words were: “OK, Houston. Hey, we’ve got a problem here.” But over the years and through the magic of editing, the phrase has been shortened for dramatic effect.
Once the discovery was made, and the problem identified, the Apollo mission quickly shifted from one of exploration (a third lunar landing) to survival (getting the crew back to earth alive). Imagine, however, if the flight crew and ground crew had all stayed stuck in their fear. What would have been the likelihood of a positive outcome?
It’s been years since the event itself, and it’s been years since I last saw the movie, Apollo 13. However, it’s been nowhere near that long since I witnessed someone getting severely bent out of shape about a life altering event or circumstance – myself included.
Problems come and problems go. Some of them are Apollo dramatic and truly life threatening. Others are simply minor blips on the old Stress-O-Meter Radar. The challenge is one of sifting the serious challenges from the minor irritations.
That’s where a degree of thoughtfulness comes into play. The next time you face a ‘Houston, we’ve got a problem’ challenge, check to see whether you are responding from fear or thoughtfulness.
Knee jerk, fear based reactions hang out in the amygdala – also referred to as our primitive lizard brain. It’s that part of the brain that creates and stores emotional memory, senses danger, and triggers the mind and body to high alert. If we only operate from states of high anxiety, chances are good we’re not accessing the clearest thinking part of our brain.
It’s a pretty strong likelihood that Chicken Little, he of ‘the sky is falling’ fable, was largely governed by his lizard brain – racing around in circles, freely distributing fear and anxiety, to all he met.
Fortunately, although we might share Chicken Little’s panicky response to a life event, we don’t need to stay stuck in our first reaction – hijacked by the amygdala. We do need to shift our attention to the neocortex – the part of the brain that’s better known for it’s analytical and reasoning abilities.
ACTION:
How then to leave the lizard behind and get a more thoughtful take on a challenging situation?
Try these actions:
– Name the fear at the center of your response. Take a closer look at its actual likelihood.
– Reach out to someone else whose point of view you respect to help you challenge your thinking.
– Tackle a first step – one small action or exploration in the direction of a solution. Let small wins propel you forward.
– Imagine a positive long-term outcome from the challenge at hand.
– Be thankful for all the other things that seem to be on track and have not gone sideways in your life.
A fresh perspective or two can go a long ways towards getting your feet back on solid ground.
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QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“There is only one cause of unhappiness: the false beliefs you have in your head, beliefs so widespread, so commonly held, that it never occurs to you to question them.” – Anthony de Mello
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RESOURCES OF THE WEEK:
Check out this online article: Five Steps To Managing Your Lizard Brain: http://www.devacoaching.com/2010/07/20/5-steps-to-managing-your-lizard-brain/
I’m also remembering a children’s story book that was a favorite around our house on tough days: “Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day” by Judith Viorst. Young Alexander learns that some days are like that – even in Australia. A fun read for old and young alike.
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READERS WRITE:
In response to last week’s message on Overwork: An Artful Life Perspective, these Pause readers write:
CH : Great advice as usual Pat. We are all artists in our own way – creating our special place in the world.
NC: Thanks for this thought provoking PAUSE . As a recovering perfectionist I found these points particularly poignant. As someone once told me, apply the KISS principal: Keep It Simple Sweetheart!
REFLECTION: 41 years ago today (April 13, 1970), Jack Swigert, astronaut on the infamous Apollo 13 mission delivered this memorable phrase, “Houston, we’ve got a problem!”, after an oxygen tank burst on their way to the Moon. In fact, Swigert’s actual words were: “OK, Houston. Hey, we’ve got a problem here.” But over the years and through the magic of editing, the phrase has been shortened for dramatic effect.
Once the discovery was made, and the problem identified, the Apollo mission quickly shifted from one of exploration (a third lunar landing) to survival (getting the crew back to earth alive). Imagine, however, if the flight crew and ground crew had all stayed stuck in their fear. What would have been the likelihood of a positive outcome?
It’s been years since the event itself, and it’s been years since I last saw the movie, Apollo 13. However, it’s been nowhere near that long since I witnessed someone getting severely bent out of shape about a life altering event or circumstance – myself included.
Problems come and problems go. Some of them are Apollo dramatic and truly life threatening. Others are simply minor blips on the old Stress-O-Meter Radar. The challenge is one of sifting the serious challenges from the minor irritations. (more…)
PAUSE -11.23- Overwork: An Artful Life Perspective
April 5, 2011
REFLECTION:
An experienced artist recently shared a few thoughts about overworking in response to a question from a novice painter. Although, the conversation centered on the negative impact of overworking a piece of art, as the discussion unfolded, I couldn’t help but notice the parallels between art and life.
The mentoring artist noted five causes of overwork:
– repeatedly going back over old ground rather than leaving well enough alone and moving on
– pushing for perfection – spending time and energy on final finishing touches that don’t add appreciable value
– forcing the work – letting impatience over-ride the flow of the paint, the brush or the pen
– overusing a well developed skill when it’s not even called for in the work of the moment
– getting caught up in the fine detail without stopping to step back for the long view and gaining perspective
ACTION:
It seems to me that we might take a page or two from the Old Masters and put them to work in our everyday work-lives.
When you find yourself challenged by overwork, take stock of these questions and see if they shift your behavior:
– Does the extra effort advance something important – or just cover old ground in another way?
– Is the task already done well enough to meet the basic needs? Would the extra 10% of effort be warranted in terms of the result?
– Mihgt you be pushing people and progress in ways that create unnecessary resistance?
– Could you be engaging in tasks just because you have polished the skill to do them – not because they’re the best use of your time at the moment, or required by the enterprise at hand?
– Have you stepped back to take a look at the big picture, or are you trapped by the minutiae of the moment?
It could be that in pausing for reflection you just might find that the extra effort isn’t necessary, or that you just hadn’t realized you were already there. Give it a whirl and see how it works.
_________________________
QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“Art is the elimination of the unnecessary.” – Pablo Picasso.
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RESOURCE OF THE WEEK:
For a few additional thoughts on Overwork and Overwhelm, see this article on CanadaJobs.com at: http://www.canadajobs.com/articles/viewarticle.cfm?ArticleID=1253
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READERS WRITE:
In response to last week’s message, Game Changing Questions, Pause reader B writes: “Another Pause meant just for me at this time! I have just returned from celebrating the life of my sister – a life cut short in her prime by cancer. She also was someone who engaged and challenged people. The 700+ who attended the celebration of her life were a testament to that. She was so different from me and had many characteristics that I admire and am trying to keep present and emulate, including engaging others with meaningful questions! Thanks – Pause is an integral part of my week.”
REFLECTION: An experienced artist recently shared a few thoughts about overworking in response to a question from a novice painter. Although, the conversation centered on the negative impact of overworking a piece of art, as the discussion unfolded, I couldn’t help but notice the parallels between art and life.
The mentoring artist noted five causes of overwork:
Repeatedly going back over old ground rather than leaving well enough alone and moving on
Striving for perfection – spending time and energy on final finishing touches that don’t add appreciable value
Forcing the work – letting impatience over-ride the flow of the paint, the brush or the pen
Overusing a well developed skill when it’s not even called for in the work of the moment
Getting caught up in the fine detail without stopping to step back for the long view and gaining perspective
ACTION: It seems to me that we might take a page or two from the Old Masters and put them to work in our everyday work-lives.
When you find yourself challenged by overwork, take stock of these questions and see if they shift your behavior: (more…)
PAUSE – 11.21 – Rest
March 22, 2011
REFLECTION:
No doubt you’ve been following the reports on the tragic earthquake, tsunami, and nuclear disaster in Japan. Apparently, one of the most credible voices offering news updates in Japan is chief cabinet secretary, Yukio Edano.
Mr. Edano broadcasts reports on the latest developments an average of five times a day – at all hours of the day and night. His listening audience is growing concerned about his health. They’re noting his tussled hair, beads of sweat on his brow, tired eyes, and a growing weariness in his expression. They’re expressing their concerns via postings on Twitter encouraging Mr. Edano to step away and get some sleep.
ACTION:
Thankfully, few of us are facing challenges as severe as the nation of Japan. Still, we may find ourselves concerned about those nearer at hand who are dangerously overextending themselves for much lesser reasons – risking health and well-being in the process. It could be that we even see one of those people when we look in the mirror in the morning.
How about following the lead of the concerned Japanese? Take or make an opportunity to reach out in concern, encouraging time for renewal when none is being taken. Encouragement could take the form of wise counsel, an invitation to step briefly away for rest or refreshment, or an offer to lend a hand and lift the load.
Zest without rest is a short-term strategy with long-term consequences.
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QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“Work when there is work to do. Rest when you are tired. One thing done in peace will most likely be better than ten things done in panic….I am not a hero if I deny rest; I am only tired.” – Susan McHenry
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RESOURCE OF THE WEEK:
For more on Sleep Debt, see this article from Scientific American: Can You Catch Up On Lost Sleep? at http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=fact-or-fiction-can-you-catch-up-on-sleep
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READERS WRITE:
In response to last week’s message, Surviving Mini Marathon, Pause reader YD writes: Interesting epiphany this morning for me. I’m a trail runner – a long distance trail runner – that’s the sport I love. It’s my frustration burning strategy, my creative / self-connection / meditation / self-love time. Over the years, I’ve developed ways to take care of my body: proper eating, yoga, stretching, sleeping, massage, taper period, etc. I’ve developed many routines to get up the day after, ready to hit the trail again.
I’m also a ‘long distance’ runner at WORK. But I realize now I don’t really have effective ways to take care of me – ways to get up the next day ready to run again. And maybe, just maybe, I should cut down on the distance I ‘run’ at work.
REFLECTION: No doubt you’ve been following the reports on the tragic earthquake, tsunami, and nuclear disaster in Japan. Apparently, one of the most credible voices offering news updates in Japan is Chief Cabinet Secretary, Yukio Edano.
Mr. Edano broadcasts reports on the latest developments an average of five times a day – at all hours of the day and night. His listening audience is growing concerned about his health. They’re noting his tussled hair, beads of sweat on his brow, tired eyes, and a growing weariness in his expression.
They’re expressing their concerns via postings on Twitter encouraging Mr. Edano to step away and get some sleep. (more…)
PAUSE – 11.20 – Surviving Mini-Marathons
March 15, 2011
REFLECTION: Have you run any mini-marathons lately? Not the athletic type – just the plain old challenging lifestyle version.
I’ve just come through an especially active couple of weeks, myself. During the first ten days of March, I was on my feet speaking at conferences and facilitating seminars for seven of those days. Two days each included an opening keynote and three follow up sessions – for a total of 13 individual presentations during that span of time. I usually limit myself to no more than two or three days of presenting each week, so this was extraordinarily compressed.
No one forced me to book this work in this way. As someone who is self employed, I’m directly responsible for what makes its way on to my calendar. This time around I agreed to this number of sessions because: the travel and timing pieces fit well together, the work itself was very appealing, I knew I could carve out prep time in advance and set aside recovery time at the end of the run, and because I’m aware that an upcoming planned get-away will limit available spring programming days.
Yes, there were surprises – crazy weather and dental emergencies amongst them. (more…)
PAUSE – 11.19 – Stopping Starting
March 8, 2011
REFLECTION: More than one study has confirmed that backlogs are an everyday fact of life in today’s overcommitted workplaces – not to mention on the home and community fronts. Despite the fact that we have an inordinate number of irons in the fire at any one time, that doesn’t seem to prevent us from adding more.
Personally, I’ve got a tall stack of books waiting for my attention. That hasn’t stopped me from firing off orders to Amazon or Chapters for yet another interesting volume or two. I’ve got a number of articles partly written, and program ideas partially developed. That doesn’t stop me from grabbing another scrap of paper and scratching out a few thoughts about yet another fresh idea. Over the years, I’ve registered a number of web domain names that seemed like an inspired idea at the time, and then let them languish for lack of attention.
REFLECTION: Last week marked a significant change in my extended family, as my parents moved from their home on the farm into a brand new residence in Saskatoon. My Dad was born in that farmhouse 85 years ago. He lived and worked there for most of his life. My Mom joined him on the farm when they married 60 years ago.
Together they raised a family of six girls, who eventually brought home husbands, grandchildren and more recently great-grandchildren. This last December, 29 of us gathered in that small one-bathroom farm house – all very much aware of the significance of one more Christmas at the farm. The roots run deep and the memories run wide.
The relocation was in the works for a few months. That time was filled with plenty of planning, choosing and deciding. Recent weeks were especially rich in emotion – as years of memorabilia was sifted and sorted – and everyone faced the now near and new realities of a change of place.
We’re definitely not alone in facing change. Every single one of you is dealing with or has dealt with changes of one kind or another – jobs, relationships, living situations, and more. (more…)
PAUSE – 11.04 – Trust The Process
January 25, 2011
REFLECTION: This year, 2011, marks my 25th year in business. To celebrate the occasion, I’ve committed myself to writing and publishing my fifth book. ‘Press Pause…Think Again’ is scheduled for release early this fall. It’s going to be similar in style to its older sister, ‘Press Pause…Press On’ – both of them compilations of the most popular Pause messages.
It’s been nine months since I took my first tentative steps on this project. You’d think I might have given birth by now! However, pulling the material together has been an arduous, circuitous, on again, off again process – even though I’ve been down this path before.
Have you noticed that some projects are like that? Slippery? Tough to get a grip? Expanding in possibility one moment, and shifting direction the next? It wasn’t until last week that the organizing structure for the material finally came into focus. And it wasn’t for lack of effort on my part.
Let me recap, so you’ll know what I mean. Last spring, I reviewed the Pause messages from the last six years – some 300 in total. I earmarked those with potential for another book and ended up with 121 of them. Since I only needed 64 for another volume, my first thought was, “Heh – that’s enough for two books!” And so, overnight, the project doubled in size. (more…)
PAUSE – 11.03 – Keeping It Simple
January 18, 2011
REFLECTION: Broker world peace. Jump-start the economy. Cure cancer. Eliminate poverty. Save the planet.
The range of global concerns seems endless. Even our more modest individual goals and ambitions can end up supersized to the max. As inspiring and enervating as big hairy audacious goals can be, they also carry significant weight. And, shouldering the weight of the world can feel overwhelming, crippling and exhausting.
That’s why a FaceBook post this week by my Halifax friend and speaker colleague, Peter Davison, struck me so positively.
Peter wrote: Go forth, do good, return home, stay blessed. Repeat as necessary.
It’s an approach to daily life and a plan of action that’s blazingly simple and eminently doable. (more…)
PAUSE -10.37- The Gift Of Trust
December 14, 2010
HAPPY NEWS:
Last week in Montreal, at the Annual Convention of CAPS (the Canadian Association of Professional Speakers), I was honored with an induction into the Canadian Speaking Hall of Fame. For more details, video and pics see the blog posting at: http://www.pauseworks.com/wp/?p=1845
REFLECTION:
In case you’ve missed the memo – or the endless media messages bombarding us daily – December is the one month of the year where giving is clearly top of mind. It’s no surprise, then, that I was intrigued by this first item on a list of tips for reducing workplace stress.
Tip number one advises giving the gift of trust. What an interesting idea!
The point is that a lack of control over one’s own work is a serious workplace stressor. Leaders who micro-manage tasks or decree exactly how everything must be tackled build neither trust nor capacity. In fact, there’s nothing more irritating than having someone lurking over your shoulder second guessing everything you’re doing, interceding to make sure it’s done the ‘right’ way (read ‘their’ way).
When we give others the freedom to make decisions about how to approach the tasks in front of them we honor their capabilities and avoid unnecessary pressures. Trusting is not only a stress reliever, but a relationship and capacity builder.
Developing trust is a bit of a catch 22 situation. Do you grant it only after it is earned? Or do you assume it until proven otherwise? Maybe it’s possible to hold both possibilities in hand at once.
Stephen M.R. Covey sheds light on this issue in his book, The Speed of Trust. He notes that building trusting relationships with others hinges on two elements: character (positive intentions and a reputation for integrity) and competence (strong capabilities and a record of results).
ACTION:
What does this mean for the way we ease the load for others? For starters, we can stop meddling in situations where others have already proven their character and competence.
People grow and develop over time. The way we oversee and interact needs to adapt as trust is built. Backing off and letting go might just be the very best gift of all!
_________________________
QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“Few things can help an individual more than to place responsibility on him, and to let him know that you trust him.” – Booker T. Washington
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RESOURCE OF THE WEEK:
Here’s a link to an article on ‘Smart Trust” by Stephen Covey based on the ideas in his book: http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/The_Speed_of_Trust.html
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READERS WRITE:
In response to the last message, ‘What Really Counts?’, Pause reader KE writes: I just finished teaching my course on the power of coaching and the science of positive psychology. We talked about different measures of success. Did you know that Bhutan measures Gross National Happiness? It’s a 30 year old policy and is soundly based on Buddhist philosophy. The British government recently announced that their office of national statistics will start measuring people’s psychological and environmental well-being, making it one of the first western countries to officially monitor happiness.
REFLECTION: In case you’ve missed the memo – or the endless media messages bombarding us daily – December is the one month of the year where giving is clearly top of mind. It’s no surprise, then, that I was intrigued by this first item on a list of tips for reducing workplace stress.
Tip number one advises giving the gift of trust. What an interesting idea!
The point is that a lack of control over one’s own work is a serious workplace stressor. Leaders who micro-manage tasks or decree exactly how everything must be tackled build neither trust nor capacity. In fact, there’s nothing more irritating than having someone lurking over your shoulder second guessing everything you’re doing, interceding to make sure it’s done the ‘right’ way (read ‘their’ way).
When we give others the freedom to make decisions about how to approach the tasks in front of them we honor their capabilities and avoid unnecessary pressures. Trusting is not only a stress reliever, but a relationship and capacity builder.
Developing trust is a bit of a catch 22 situation. (more…)
PAUSE -10.36- What Really Counts?
November 30, 2010
REFLECTION:
My three year old grandson has learned to count. Everything around him is fodder for practice: fingers, books, days on the calendar. As he gets more proficient at counting, concepts like yours/mine and more/less are also popping to the fore. Who has more smarties? Who scored more points? The comparisons fuel both victory dances and mini meltdowns.
As we mature, we continue to count. Only the objects of our affection or attention change. How many widgets sold? Clients served? Dollars banked? Gadgets owned? Miles traveled? This raises the question of what REALLY counts in life.
My niece waxed eloquent on this very concept in a recent blog posting. Jillian is a young entrepreneurial craftswoman currently living in Pocatello, Idaho. As a one woman shop, she’s making a name for herself in the world of web community and online commerce through her unique jewelry designs, novel photography and engaging writing. She notes the pressure to ‘make the numbers’. With Jill’s permission, I’m sharing her recent commentary on success.
“Which of these do you value more – quantity or quality? Success, for me, in this crafty world of mine, is when I enter into my creative space and perfectly translate a vision into metal and stone. Success for many others is in the numbers. Numbers of Twitter followers. Numbers of Facebook friends. Numbers of sales. Numbers! Numbers! Numbers!
Does any of that matter if you feel unfulfilled in your work? Does any of that matter if you aren’t true to who you are?
Today I experienced a glorious nibble of success. I finished three pieces of jewelry. I scraped one piece-of-crap-ruined-jewelry into my metal recycling bin on my workbench. I went for a walk in the weather. I loved my husband. I connected with a few wonderful folks out there in the interwebs. I gave my cat a belly rub. I made a delicious pizza for supper and now I’m going to go eat it, with a glass of Malbec. I’m all about the quality in this life – to hell with the numbers (please do pardon my French).
This kind of day to day success is so delightful. It really is. What else could matter? Just live each day well, I say. Just do your best. The rest is not your business.”
ACTION:
There is a time, a place and a purpose for measuring, counting, monitoring. We just need to be clear that we are scoring and tracking the things that truly matter – in our work and in our lives at large.
What will you choose to keep an eye on today? Manage your attention with intention.
_________________________
QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“Be selective about your external influences.” – Brian Tracy
_________________________
RESOURCE OF THE WEEK:
If Jillian’s voice caught your attention, you might enjoy more of her take on life and work at: http://thenoisyplume.blogspot.com/
_________________________
READERS WRITE:
Two Pause readers comment on last week’s message on TAT (Turn Around Time).
EF writes: Thanks for sharing ideas to help folks stop, look and listen to what is going on in the fast track of life when we forget to build in turn around time.
KL writes: We just returned from a trip to Ontario which included a little work, visits with relatives, a wedding and a visit with friends. It was great, but as we were coming home my husband commented that we should have built in some down time. It wasn’t rushed or even too packed – just too many.
REFLECTION: My three year old grandson has learned to count. Everything around him is fodder for practice: fingers, books, days on the calendar. As he gets more proficient at counting, concepts like yours/mine and more/less are also popping to the fore. Who has more smarties? Who scored more points? The comparisons fuel both victory dances and mini meltdowns.
As we mature, we continue to count. Only the objects of our affection or attention change. How many widgets sold? Clients served? Dollars banked? Gadgets owned? Miles traveled? This raises the question of what REALLY counts in life.
My niece waxed eloquent on this very concept in a recent blog posting. Jillian is a young entrepreneurial craftswoman currently living in Pocatello, Idaho. As a one woman shop, she’s making a name for herself in the world of web community and online commerce through her unique jewelry designs, novel photography and engaging writing. She notes the pressure to ‘make the numbers’. With Jill’s permission, I’m sharing her recent commentary on success.
“Which of these do you value more – quantity or quality? Success, for me, in this crafty world of mine, is when I enter into my creative space and perfectly translate a vision into metal and stone. Success for many others is in the numbers. Numbers of Twitter followers. Numbers of Facebook friends. Numbers of sales. Numbers! Numbers! Numbers!
Does any of that matter if you feel unfulfilled in your work? Does any of that matter if you aren’t true to who you are? (more…)
REFLECTION: 41 years ago today (April 13, 1970), Jack Swigert, astronaut on the infamous Apollo 13 mission delivered this memorable phrase, “Houston, we’ve got a problem!”, after an oxygen tank burst on their way to the Moon. In fact, Swigert’s actual words were: “OK, Houston. Hey, we’ve got a problem here.” But over the years and through the magic of editing, the phrase has been shortened for dramatic effect.
REFLECTION: An experienced artist recently shared a few thoughts about overworking in response to a question from a novice painter. Although, the conversation centered on the negative impact of overworking a piece of art, as the discussion unfolded, I couldn’t help but notice the parallels between art and life.
REFLECTION: No doubt you’ve been following the reports on the tragic earthquake, tsunami, and nuclear disaster in Japan. Apparently, one of the most credible voices offering news updates in Japan is Chief Cabinet Secretary, Yukio Edano.
REFLECTION: Have you run any mini-marathons lately? Not the athletic type – just the plain old challenging lifestyle version.
REFLECTION: More than one study has confirmed that backlogs are an everyday fact of life in today’s overcommitted workplaces – not to mention on the home and community fronts. Despite the fact that we have an inordinate number of irons in the fire at any one time, that doesn’t seem to prevent us from adding more.
REFLECTION: Last week marked a significant change in my extended family, as my parents moved from their home on the farm into a brand new residence in Saskatoon. My Dad was born in that farmhouse 85 years ago. He lived and worked there for most of his life. My Mom joined him on the farm when they married 60 years ago.
REFLECTION: This year, 2011, marks my 25th year in business. To celebrate the occasion, I’ve committed myself to writing and publishing my fifth book. ‘Press Pause…Think Again’ is scheduled for release early this fall. It’s going to be similar in style to its older sister, ‘Press Pause…Press On’ – both of them compilations of the most popular Pause messages.
REFLECTION: Broker world peace. Jump-start the economy. Cure cancer. Eliminate poverty. Save the planet.
REFLECTION: In case you’ve missed the memo – or the endless media messages bombarding us daily – December is the one month of the year where giving is clearly top of mind. It’s no surprise, then, that I was intrigued by this first item on a list of tips for reducing workplace stress.
REFLECTION: My three year old grandson has learned to count. Everything around him is fodder for practice: fingers, books, days on the calendar. As he gets more proficient at counting, concepts like yours/mine and more/less are also popping to the fore. Who has more smarties? Who scored more points? The comparisons fuel both victory dances and mini meltdowns.