REFLECTION: Have you run any mini-marathons lately? Not the athletic type – just the plain old challenging lifestyle version.
I’ve just come through an especially active couple of weeks, myself. During the first ten days of March, I was on my feet speaking at conferences and facilitating seminars for seven of those days. Two days each included an opening keynote and three follow up sessions – for a total of 13 individual presentations during that span of time. I usually limit myself to no more than two or three days of presenting each week, so this was extraordinarily compressed.
No one forced me to book this work in this way. As someone who is self employed, I’m directly responsible for what makes its way on to my calendar. This time around I agreed to this number of sessions because: the travel and timing pieces fit well together, the work itself was very appealing, I knew I could carve out prep time in advance and set aside recovery time at the end of the run, and because I’m aware that an upcoming planned get-away will limit available spring programming days.
Yes, there were surprises – crazy weather and dental emergencies amongst them. (more…)
PAUSE – 11.19 – Stopping Starting
March 8, 2011
REFLECTION: More than one study has confirmed that backlogs are an everyday fact of life in today’s overcommitted workplaces – not to mention on the home and community fronts. Despite the fact that we have an inordinate number of irons in the fire at any one time, that doesn’t seem to prevent us from adding more.
Personally, I’ve got a tall stack of books waiting for my attention. That hasn’t stopped me from firing off orders to Amazon or Chapters for yet another interesting volume or two. I’ve got a number of articles partly written, and program ideas partially developed. That doesn’t stop me from grabbing another scrap of paper and scratching out a few thoughts about yet another fresh idea. Over the years, I’ve registered a number of web domain names that seemed like an inspired idea at the time, and then let them languish for lack of attention.
REFLECTION: Last week marked a significant change in my extended family, as my parents moved from their home on the farm into a brand new residence in Saskatoon. My Dad was born in that farmhouse 85 years ago. He lived and worked there for most of his life. My Mom joined him on the farm when they married 60 years ago.
Together they raised a family of six girls, who eventually brought home husbands, grandchildren and more recently great-grandchildren. This last December, 29 of us gathered in that small one-bathroom farm house – all very much aware of the significance of one more Christmas at the farm. The roots run deep and the memories run wide.
The relocation was in the works for a few months. That time was filled with plenty of planning, choosing and deciding. Recent weeks were especially rich in emotion – as years of memorabilia was sifted and sorted – and everyone faced the now near and new realities of a change of place.
We’re definitely not alone in facing change. Every single one of you is dealing with or has dealt with changes of one kind or another – jobs, relationships, living situations, and more. (more…)
PAUSE – 11.17 – Aversion To Stillness
February 22, 2011
REFLECTION:
An aversion to stillness is a growing phenomenon in our plugged in world.
Case in point. I recently facilitated a day in a leadership development program. During the day we were in and out of group work and discussion.
People were pretty conscientious about turning off their cell phone ringers and setting the gadgets to vibrate. So the ‘audible call-out’ distractions were minimized. However, that didn’t stop people from repeatedly reaching for their phones in much the same way as infants reach for their pacifiers – to plug into something that fills the void.
As soon as group discussion wound down, or a break was announced, people grabbed their phones to check on the world outside. This essentially cut out those to their left and right who might want to engage in further interaction. After all, who wants to get between someone and their phone. However, it also robbed the individual of the opportunity to be still with their own thoughts – in the absence of input from the outside world. Who knows what kind of insights might have arisen given half a chance to see the light of day?
An article in last week’s Globe and Mail (see Resource of the Week) describes software that will, in return for your cash, shut down your internet access for a predetermined period of time. For $15 the Anti Social application will turn off your access to social media sites for a time of your choosing. For $10 the Freedom application will keep you from accessing ANY part of the web for up to eight hours.
Has it really come to this that we are so undisciplined – so addicted to input from elsewhere – that we are willing to pay others to handcuff us – to stop us from grasping incessantly for the technology in our lives?
ACTION:
Try taking the ‘Aversion To Stillness’ challenge. See how easy you find it to sit still and do nothing for a full two minutes. Visit: http://www.donothingfor2minutes.com/
What does your success or lack thereof say about your ability to be calmly, totally present to your self and to the moment? Are you pleased with the message?
_________________________
QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“Presence is more than just being there.” – Malcolm S. Forbes
In response to last week’s message, ‘Easily Pleased’, Pause reader June F writes: This reminded me of a conversation that I recently had with my Mom. We were chatting about my Grandfather. She was saying how she still held a grudge of sorts with him because a few times when I was a child (probably going back 30 years now) he had promised to take me to the farm with him, and then he hadn’t shown up. I was shocked, and told her so. I had no recollection of the times that he didn’t show up; but I had such great memories of the times that he did. I’m sure I may have been briefly disappointed as a child. But that disappointment didn’t last long as I moved onto something else to occupy my time and delight myself. Children have such an amazing resilience. I try to remember this each day as I come across something that I could let disappoint me. Usually it’s not worth the time moping about. I quickly move on to something that will bring me joy. Thanks for this reminder to keep this attitude each day.
REFLECTION: An aversion to stillness is a growing phenomenon in our plugged in world.
Case in point. I recently facilitated a day in a leadership development program. The session focused on Modeling The Way & Encouraging the Heart – two essential leadership practices. During the day we were in and out of group work and discussion.
People were pretty conscientious about turning off their cell phone ringers and setting the gadgets to vibrate. So the ‘audible call-out’ distractions were minimized. However, that didn’t stop people from repeatedly reaching for their phones in much the same way as infants reach for their pacifiers – to plug into something that fills the void.
As soon as group discussion wound down, or a break was announced, people grabbed their phones to check on the world outside. This essentially cut out those to their left and right who might want to engage in further interaction. After all, who wants to get between someone and their phone. However, it also robbed the individual of the opportunity to be still with their own thoughts – in the absence of input from the outside world. Who knows what kind of insights might have arisen given half a chance to see the light of day? (more…)
PAUSE – 11.16 – Easily Pleased
February 15, 2011
REFLECTION: Over the years, I’ve grown to enjoy the ‘one a day’ practice. I’m not talking about an apple a day keeping the doctor away, or a one-a-day vitamin to keep the body ticking along. I’m referring to what are often called Day Books. They’re collections of short essays or readings – one for each day of the year. These reflections shine a light on ideas or offer new ways of thinking about or looking at things. The best of them spark new perspectives to carry through your day.
One of the first Day Books that I dipped into years ago was a gift from a fellow ‘balance-challenged’ friend – a volume by Anne Wilson Schaef titled Meditations For Women Who Do Too Much. I’ve enjoyed many different Day Book types and topics over the years.
This year, I’m dipping into The Book of Awakening by Mark Nepo. The author’s struggle with cancer and his study of the human spirit have brought a laser like focus to his thinking about life. He’s an insightful observer and a skilled writer.
The sign of a good reflection is when its impact lingers beyond 24 hours and past the next reading in the book. It’s three weeks now since I read Mark’s January 20th treatise, and I keep coming back to his idea. (more…)
PAUSE – 11.04 – Trust The Process
January 25, 2011
REFLECTION: This year, 2011, marks my 25th year in business. To celebrate the occasion, I’ve committed myself to writing and publishing my fifth book. ‘Press Pause…Think Again’ is scheduled for release early this fall. It’s going to be similar in style to its older sister, ‘Press Pause…Press On’ – both of them compilations of the most popular Pause messages.
It’s been nine months since I took my first tentative steps on this project. You’d think I might have given birth by now! However, pulling the material together has been an arduous, circuitous, on again, off again process – even though I’ve been down this path before.
Have you noticed that some projects are like that? Slippery? Tough to get a grip? Expanding in possibility one moment, and shifting direction the next? It wasn’t until last week that the organizing structure for the material finally came into focus. And it wasn’t for lack of effort on my part.
Let me recap, so you’ll know what I mean. Last spring, I reviewed the Pause messages from the last six years – some 300 in total. I earmarked those with potential for another book and ended up with 121 of them. Since I only needed 64 for another volume, my first thought was, “Heh – that’s enough for two books!” And so, overnight, the project doubled in size. (more…)
PAUSE – 11.03 – Keeping It Simple
January 18, 2011
REFLECTION: Broker world peace. Jump-start the economy. Cure cancer. Eliminate poverty. Save the planet.
The range of global concerns seems endless. Even our more modest individual goals and ambitions can end up supersized to the max. As inspiring and enervating as big hairy audacious goals can be, they also carry significant weight. And, shouldering the weight of the world can feel overwhelming, crippling and exhausting.
That’s why a FaceBook post this week by my Halifax friend and speaker colleague, Peter Davison, struck me so positively.
Peter wrote: Go forth, do good, return home, stay blessed. Repeat as necessary.
It’s an approach to daily life and a plan of action that’s blazingly simple and eminently doable. (more…)
PAUSE -10.37- The Gift Of Trust
December 14, 2010
HAPPY NEWS:
Last week in Montreal, at the Annual Convention of CAPS (the Canadian Association of Professional Speakers), I was honored with an induction into the Canadian Speaking Hall of Fame. For more details, video and pics see the blog posting at: http://www.pauseworks.com/wp/?p=1845
REFLECTION:
In case you’ve missed the memo – or the endless media messages bombarding us daily – December is the one month of the year where giving is clearly top of mind. It’s no surprise, then, that I was intrigued by this first item on a list of tips for reducing workplace stress.
Tip number one advises giving the gift of trust. What an interesting idea!
The point is that a lack of control over one’s own work is a serious workplace stressor. Leaders who micro-manage tasks or decree exactly how everything must be tackled build neither trust nor capacity. In fact, there’s nothing more irritating than having someone lurking over your shoulder second guessing everything you’re doing, interceding to make sure it’s done the ‘right’ way (read ‘their’ way).
When we give others the freedom to make decisions about how to approach the tasks in front of them we honor their capabilities and avoid unnecessary pressures. Trusting is not only a stress reliever, but a relationship and capacity builder.
Developing trust is a bit of a catch 22 situation. Do you grant it only after it is earned? Or do you assume it until proven otherwise? Maybe it’s possible to hold both possibilities in hand at once.
Stephen M.R. Covey sheds light on this issue in his book, The Speed of Trust. He notes that building trusting relationships with others hinges on two elements: character (positive intentions and a reputation for integrity) and competence (strong capabilities and a record of results).
ACTION:
What does this mean for the way we ease the load for others? For starters, we can stop meddling in situations where others have already proven their character and competence.
People grow and develop over time. The way we oversee and interact needs to adapt as trust is built. Backing off and letting go might just be the very best gift of all!
_________________________
QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“Few things can help an individual more than to place responsibility on him, and to let him know that you trust him.” – Booker T. Washington
_________________________
RESOURCE OF THE WEEK:
Here’s a link to an article on ‘Smart Trust” by Stephen Covey based on the ideas in his book: http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/The_Speed_of_Trust.html
_________________________
READERS WRITE:
In response to the last message, ‘What Really Counts?’, Pause reader KE writes: I just finished teaching my course on the power of coaching and the science of positive psychology. We talked about different measures of success. Did you know that Bhutan measures Gross National Happiness? It’s a 30 year old policy and is soundly based on Buddhist philosophy. The British government recently announced that their office of national statistics will start measuring people’s psychological and environmental well-being, making it one of the first western countries to officially monitor happiness.
REFLECTION: In case you’ve missed the memo – or the endless media messages bombarding us daily – December is the one month of the year where giving is clearly top of mind. It’s no surprise, then, that I was intrigued by this first item on a list of tips for reducing workplace stress.
Tip number one advises giving the gift of trust. What an interesting idea!
The point is that a lack of control over one’s own work is a serious workplace stressor. Leaders who micro-manage tasks or decree exactly how everything must be tackled build neither trust nor capacity. In fact, there’s nothing more irritating than having someone lurking over your shoulder second guessing everything you’re doing, interceding to make sure it’s done the ‘right’ way (read ‘their’ way).
When we give others the freedom to make decisions about how to approach the tasks in front of them we honor their capabilities and avoid unnecessary pressures. Trusting is not only a stress reliever, but a relationship and capacity builder.
Developing trust is a bit of a catch 22 situation. (more…)
PAUSE -10.36- What Really Counts?
November 30, 2010
REFLECTION:
My three year old grandson has learned to count. Everything around him is fodder for practice: fingers, books, days on the calendar. As he gets more proficient at counting, concepts like yours/mine and more/less are also popping to the fore. Who has more smarties? Who scored more points? The comparisons fuel both victory dances and mini meltdowns.
As we mature, we continue to count. Only the objects of our affection or attention change. How many widgets sold? Clients served? Dollars banked? Gadgets owned? Miles traveled? This raises the question of what REALLY counts in life.
My niece waxed eloquent on this very concept in a recent blog posting. Jillian is a young entrepreneurial craftswoman currently living in Pocatello, Idaho. As a one woman shop, she’s making a name for herself in the world of web community and online commerce through her unique jewelry designs, novel photography and engaging writing. She notes the pressure to ‘make the numbers’. With Jill’s permission, I’m sharing her recent commentary on success.
“Which of these do you value more – quantity or quality? Success, for me, in this crafty world of mine, is when I enter into my creative space and perfectly translate a vision into metal and stone. Success for many others is in the numbers. Numbers of Twitter followers. Numbers of Facebook friends. Numbers of sales. Numbers! Numbers! Numbers!
Does any of that matter if you feel unfulfilled in your work? Does any of that matter if you aren’t true to who you are?
Today I experienced a glorious nibble of success. I finished three pieces of jewelry. I scraped one piece-of-crap-ruined-jewelry into my metal recycling bin on my workbench. I went for a walk in the weather. I loved my husband. I connected with a few wonderful folks out there in the interwebs. I gave my cat a belly rub. I made a delicious pizza for supper and now I’m going to go eat it, with a glass of Malbec. I’m all about the quality in this life – to hell with the numbers (please do pardon my French).
This kind of day to day success is so delightful. It really is. What else could matter? Just live each day well, I say. Just do your best. The rest is not your business.”
ACTION:
There is a time, a place and a purpose for measuring, counting, monitoring. We just need to be clear that we are scoring and tracking the things that truly matter – in our work and in our lives at large.
What will you choose to keep an eye on today? Manage your attention with intention.
_________________________
QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“Be selective about your external influences.” – Brian Tracy
_________________________
RESOURCE OF THE WEEK:
If Jillian’s voice caught your attention, you might enjoy more of her take on life and work at: http://thenoisyplume.blogspot.com/
_________________________
READERS WRITE:
Two Pause readers comment on last week’s message on TAT (Turn Around Time).
EF writes: Thanks for sharing ideas to help folks stop, look and listen to what is going on in the fast track of life when we forget to build in turn around time.
KL writes: We just returned from a trip to Ontario which included a little work, visits with relatives, a wedding and a visit with friends. It was great, but as we were coming home my husband commented that we should have built in some down time. It wasn’t rushed or even too packed – just too many.
REFLECTION: My three year old grandson has learned to count. Everything around him is fodder for practice: fingers, books, days on the calendar. As he gets more proficient at counting, concepts like yours/mine and more/less are also popping to the fore. Who has more smarties? Who scored more points? The comparisons fuel both victory dances and mini meltdowns.
As we mature, we continue to count. Only the objects of our affection or attention change. How many widgets sold? Clients served? Dollars banked? Gadgets owned? Miles traveled? This raises the question of what REALLY counts in life.
My niece waxed eloquent on this very concept in a recent blog posting. Jillian is a young entrepreneurial craftswoman currently living in Pocatello, Idaho. As a one woman shop, she’s making a name for herself in the world of web community and online commerce through her unique jewelry designs, novel photography and engaging writing. She notes the pressure to ‘make the numbers’. With Jill’s permission, I’m sharing her recent commentary on success.
“Which of these do you value more – quantity or quality? Success, for me, in this crafty world of mine, is when I enter into my creative space and perfectly translate a vision into metal and stone. Success for many others is in the numbers. Numbers of Twitter followers. Numbers of Facebook friends. Numbers of sales. Numbers! Numbers! Numbers!
Does any of that matter if you feel unfulfilled in your work? Does any of that matter if you aren’t true to who you are? (more…)
PAUSE -10.35- How’s your TAT Quo?
November 23, 2010
NOTE:
Final week to take advantage of the Big Box Bonus Bundle offer. Check the end of message for details.
REFLECTION:
This year, September and October were pretty active months in my life. It didn’t really hit me how active they had been until November rolled around and my schedule loosened up a bit. Quite the contrast!
S & O were filled with great things – no complaints there! Challenging work with interesting clients. An engaging conference on workplace wellness. A heartfelt farewell to a dear friend. A family wedding celebration. An exciting vacation get away. Mentoring and charity work. I wouldn’t have traded away any of those activities.
In retrospect, what I might have done differently is paid more attention to TAT – the Turn Around Time – between events. There’s a lot of performance pressure to reduce Turn Around Time in the world of work – faster responses to messages, quicker delivery of products, instant access to services. But there can be a personal cost to upping the ante.
When TAT shrinks, pressure grows. There is no longer time to savor what you’ve just experienced nor to fully anticipate what comes next. Minor glitches easily assume major proportions. The rhythm shifts to rush and roar – as we spend our days rushing in and roaring out.
Richard Swenson describes what’s missing in these situations as margin – those gaps in timing, the cushioning between engagements, a sense of openness to possibilities in our daily experience. Linda Popov describes what we might aspire to instead as a pace of grace.
ACTION:
If TAT is an issue for you, too, here are a handful of strategies to play with as you try to strike a more satisfying balance on Turn Around Time:
Build ‘mop up’ time into the scheduling of meetings and events. If a gathering ends at 4:00, it will probably be 4:30 before you’ve finished those last minute conversations, packed up, made a washroom stop, and disengaged enough to move on. Knowing that, don’t book your next engagement across town for 4:15.
To minimize overcommitment, make prep time visible on your calendar. If you’ve got two hours of work to get ready for an event, designate a block of time for prep. Whether it happens at that specific time or not, you’ll remember that those two hours are spoken for.
Build minor travel time into your appointment schedule. So far, instantaneous tele-transporting is not an option. It takes time to walk to the other end of the building or to drive across town. Book accordingly.
Choose flights to allow an extra cushion for delays and weather. Taking the second last flight out – rather than the last flight out gives you a little more wriggle room. Arriving early at the airport takes away some of the pressure of surprise line-ups at security.
Honor your down-time needs. If you are more introverted by nature, you’ll need more solo time and space between people engagements to replenish your energy. There’s nothing wrong with that. Just plan around it.
Pay attention as you move through your day and week. Note where you find yourself pinched by a lack of TAT. Adjust accordingly.
________________________
QUOTE OF THE WEEK:
“Determination alone is nothing without discernment.” – Linda Kavelin Popov.
_________________________
RESOURCE OF THE WEEK:
Ned offers a fun way to put this issue in perspective. Check out his four minute video: No Margin Ned at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wuLza5wlJUI&feature=related . Ned’s strategies for doing away with margin will help you stress up your life, big time!
________________________
BIG BOX BONUS BUNDLE:
I can’t believe it! We’ve sold all the copies from the original print run of my latest book, Press Pause…Press On. And so, we fired up the presses and rolled off a second batch of books. There’s good news in this for you!
The books are boxed 48 to a carton with a little headroom to spare. I’m taking 10 of those boxes and stuffing that extra space with this collection of bonus goodies: 2 more books (to top it up to 50), 50 Pause decals, 10 copies of my Take A Break booklet, 5 Pause postcards, 1 set of 4 Pause Posters (8.5×11), 5 Pause postcards, and 1 Pause mousepad.
The retail value of the whole enchilada totals a shade over $1100. From now through the 30th of November, ten of these bundles are up for grabs for $550 each (plus taxes & shipping). Perfect timing for seasonal gifts for clients, colleagues and friends. (Too many for your needs? Partner up with a colleague to take advantage of the savings.)
The B4 reprint special is available only by phone and only for one more week. Call toll free at 877-728-5289 to order your Big Box Bonus Bundle now.
NOTE: Final week to take advantage of the Big Box Bonus Bundle offer. Check the end of message for details.
REFLECTION: This year, September and October were pretty active months in my life. It didn’t really hit me how active they had been until November rolled around and my schedule loosened up a bit. Quite the contrast!
S & O were filled – bumper to bumper – with lots of great things. No complaints there! Challenging work with interesting clients. An engaging conference on workplace wellness. A heartfelt farewell to a dear friend. A family wedding celebration. An exciting vacation get away. Mentoring and charity work. I wouldn’t have traded away any of those activities.
In retrospect, what I might have done differently is paid more attention to TAT – the Turn Around Time – between events. It was a bit too ‘next…next…next’ – too often at the expense of the here and now.
There’s a lot of performance pressure to reduce Turn Around Time in the world of work – faster responses to messages, speedier delivery of products, more instant access to services. But there can be a personal cost to upping the ante.
When TAT shrinks, pressure grows.There is no longer time to savor what you’ve just experienced nor to fully anticipate what comes next. Minor glitches easily assume major proportions. The rhythm shifts to rush and roar – as we spend our days rushing in and roaring out. (more…)
REFLECTION: Have you run any mini-marathons lately? Not the athletic type – just the plain old challenging lifestyle version.
REFLECTION: More than one study has confirmed that backlogs are an everyday fact of life in today’s overcommitted workplaces – not to mention on the home and community fronts. Despite the fact that we have an inordinate number of irons in the fire at any one time, that doesn’t seem to prevent us from adding more.
REFLECTION: Last week marked a significant change in my extended family, as my parents moved from their home on the farm into a brand new residence in Saskatoon. My Dad was born in that farmhouse 85 years ago. He lived and worked there for most of his life. My Mom joined him on the farm when they married 60 years ago.
REFLECTION: An aversion to stillness is a growing phenomenon in our plugged in world.
REFLECTION: Over the years, I’ve grown to enjoy the ‘one a day’ practice. I’m not talking about an apple a day keeping the doctor away, or a one-a-day vitamin to keep the body ticking along. I’m referring to what are often called Day Books. They’re collections of short essays or readings – one for each day of the year. These reflections shine a light on ideas or offer new ways of thinking about or looking at things. The best of them spark new perspectives to carry through your day.
REFLECTION: This year, 2011, marks my 25th year in business. To celebrate the occasion, I’ve committed myself to writing and publishing my fifth book. ‘Press Pause…Think Again’ is scheduled for release early this fall. It’s going to be similar in style to its older sister, ‘Press Pause…Press On’ – both of them compilations of the most popular Pause messages.
REFLECTION: Broker world peace. Jump-start the economy. Cure cancer. Eliminate poverty. Save the planet.
REFLECTION: In case you’ve missed the memo – or the endless media messages bombarding us daily – December is the one month of the year where giving is clearly top of mind. It’s no surprise, then, that I was intrigued by this first item on a list of tips for reducing workplace stress.
REFLECTION: My three year old grandson has learned to count. Everything around him is fodder for practice: fingers, books, days on the calendar. As he gets more proficient at counting, concepts like yours/mine and more/less are also popping to the fore. Who has more smarties? Who scored more points? The comparisons fuel both victory dances and mini meltdowns.
REFLECTION: This year, September and October were pretty active months in my life. It didn’t really hit me how active they had been until November rolled around and my schedule loosened up a bit. Quite the contrast!