Reflection: Does your upcoming summer vacation carry a ‘same as last year’ flavor? This might be a time to change it up a bit. Start by asking yourself this question: “What do I need most?” See what shows up in your answer.

Might you need:

• Serious solo down time with next to no demands?
• The emotional lift of reconnecting with favored friends or family?
• Spiritual renewal through a serious dose of time outdoors?
• The excitement and adventure of seeing new places and meeting new faces?
• The mental challenge of learning something new?
• Catch-up time taking care of fix-its and tasks around home?
• Couple time with a hint of romance?
• Time to dejunk and and reorganize those out-of-control spaces in your life?

Could be one or some of these or something else entirely. Of course, if you’re not on your own, family vacations usually end up being a compromise of sorts. You may have a mix of extroverts and introverts – some longing for big time socials and others for ‘me’ time. You might be a ‘major road trip’ fan partnered with a ‘hang out in one place’ person. Family traditions might dictate a visit ‘home’ at the center of every vacation – no exceptions.

So, how to get around differing – and changing – needs or preferences? Try thinking ‘yes/and’ instead of ‘either/or’.

• Maybe you could spend most of your time with extended family, AND still arrange a couple-only weekend getaway while the kids hang with the grands.
• Maybe you could combine a 5 day road trip out and 5 day road trip back with 5 days in the middle parked in one place without daily packing, repacking, and moving on.
• Maybe you could take a weeklong adventure trip AND use up a few more days pre or post vacation on home maintenance tinkering.
• Maybe you could all travel together, AND take time in the places you visit for each of you to do your own thing on occasional solo afternoons or mornings.
• Maybe you could combine travel AND a cooking or art class at your destination – seeing new territory and learning something new at the same time.

Action: The right choice starts with honoring what you want or need – from the inside out – and not simply responding to the expectations of others. So, take some time and tune in your own heart and mind. Encourage others to do the same. Share the insights, and find a way to work the varied preferences into the plans.

Net result: more satisfaction, less resentment, and, a greater chance of renewal for everyone. That is, after all, what an annual leave is all about. Happy holidays, everybody!

Quotes Of The Week: A vacation is what you take when you can no longer take what you’ve been taking. – Earl Wilson

Those that say ‘you can’t take it with you’ never saw a car packed for a vacation trip.  – Jerry Smith

A vacation trip is one-third pleasure, fondly remembered, and two-thirds aggravation, entirely forgotten. – Robert Brault

Resource Of The Week: According to this study, it takes almost a full day (21 hours and 31 minutes to be exact) for vacationers to be able to sit back and relax enough to start enjoying a holiday. I don’t know how they measure the decompression so precisely, but it’s an interesting article all the same: Sit Back & Relax.

Readers Write: In response to a recent message, Who Needs A Break, Pause reader SF writes: Last weekend I did something I’ve thought about for a couple years. I bought a small water fountain for my deck. I love the sound of water trickling and find it so relaxing. Since installing the fountain, I’ve taken several mental wealth breaks – sometimes only a few minutes, sometimes longer. And I LOVE IT!!  It seems to shift the gears down for my whole day. I can really relate to what you are saying. Thanks for your words of wisdom. Keep up the great work!