REFLECTION: I bumped into a friend the other day, asked her how she was, and watched her promptly burst into tears. She’d hit the wall, overwhelmed by a series of business growth challenges heaped on her plate. As she outlined each challenge in turn, she punctuated each description with the phrase, “But, it’s all good!” Working through the current stresses may well generate significant future returns. Still, I couldn’t help but note – and worry – that each restatement of the phrase, “It’s All Good”, was accompanied by an uber-pained look resembling someone passing a serious gall stone.

Just a few days later, I listened to another friend describe the serious health challenges being faced by several members of her family. She, too, punctuated the litany of tough situations with the phrase, “But, it’s all good.”

And, in an online update, yet a third friend, referenced a  business disappointment and ended her posting with the phrase, “But, it’s all good!”

They’re not alone, of course. I’ve said those words myself in the face of some very tough situations. Maybe you have, too.

Now, it could well be that all of these situations are minor glitches, temporary overloads, and short term challenges  – something to be endured and embraced in the service of growth or another valued purpose. And, it’s true that a positive, optimistic spirit is a helpful mindset to hold – and even occasionally our ONLY good choice.

Still, a part of me can’t help but wonder if sometimes  ‘It’s All Good!” isn’t more a statement of faith than a statement of fact. And, might continually repeating the mantra distance us from taking a closer look at the reality of our situation.

Are there serious cracks in the foundation? Are chronic problems going untended? Do turning point decisions need to be addressed? Is there another way – a better way – a less stressful way – through?

ACTION: The next time you encounter a challenging situation and find yourself repeatedly reassuring yourself with the words, “It’s All Good!”, step aside for a moment of reflection.  And check the reflection looking back at you in the mirror. Whether it’s a personal quandary, workplace wrangle, or organizational puzzle, a major rethink might be in order.

Let’s not allow the repetition of the phrase, ‘It’s All Good!” to become a pacifier that defers a problem where there could be action that might well resolve it – or at the very least, ease the burden of the moment.

On the other hand, maybe it IS all good. If so, carry on!

QUOTES OF THE WEEK:

There were so many interesting quotes on the relationship between illusion and reality, that I couldn’t resist gifting you with a whole whack of them. Enjoy!

• “What is reality anyway! It’s nothing but a collective hunch.” – Jane Wagner
• “I have a very firm grasp on reality! I can reach out and strangle it any time!” – Author Unknown
• “Question reality, especially if it contradicts the evidence of your hopes and dreams.” – Robert Brault
• “Okay, who put a stop payment on my reality check?” – Author Unknown
• “Listening to both sides of a story will convince you that there is more to a story than both sides.” – Frank Tyger
• “Reality is a palette that humans paint on to let themselves sleep better at night.” – Author Unknown
• “After you’ve heard two eyewitness accounts of an auto accident, you begin to worry about history.” – Author Unknown
• “Reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it.” – Jane Wagner

RESOURCE OF THE WEEK:

I’ve long been an admirer of Dr. Gabor Mate’s work on health and wellbeing. Here’s an interesting article by Mate on the relationship between the pressure of our lives and the pressure in our bodies.

READERS WRITE:

In response to the recent message on ‘Recess-itation‘, Pause reader SD writes: An interesting point on recess; however kids now-a-days don’t know what to do at recess. Games of four square, skipping and dodge ball are gone. They stand around for the most part not knowing what to do. At my children’s school they allow the older kids to just stay inside and play on their iPods instead of insisting that they be active at recess. The school finds it easier than dealing with the issues that occur on the playground. Think how sad their life will be since they don’t know how to play at the age of 13.